Judge Lindsey changed the face of relationships.

Judge Benjamin Barr Lindsey

Many years ago for women especially it was thought of that the man owned the wife in a relationship. That the women were not allowed to have their own life and they were demanded to perform certain duties around the house and relationship. This was so wrong. A great Judge back in the 1900's lost his position on the bar because he stated that relationships should be a partnership. That judge was Benjamin Barr Lindsey and the book that got him disbarred was entitled "The Companionate Marriage". Basically what the book said was that relationship were choices and that both sexes were free to have this union and a life. This was considered radical at the time and obviously cost Judge Lindsey dearly. Thank goodness times have changed. While things are not better for all women for a good majority of them life is much better because of actions like Judge Lindsey. For a relationship to truly be enjoyed we must each put as much effort into it as we can and that energy combines into a wonderful feast of love.

The Journey

"Our steps become a journey as we start putting them together. Our steps become easier when there is someone special to help us take them. Now our journey has become one of love." - Zob

Ad some miracle grow to your relationship.

The beauty of nature is obvious to most of us. Looking out over swaying trees and beautiful flowers is one of the great joys of life. You can however use this bit of nature to improve your relationship. We all know that getting a bundle of flowers is a wonderful way to say I love you. Why not take it a step further and start purchasing plants for your home or that can be planted outside later as a display of your love. House plants are great not only as a gift but they give oxygen off that is wonderful for us humans. Plus it can fill your house with an outdoorsy smell that is wonderful. Cut flowers wilt and die and that is not the image you want for your relationship so pick up something the will flourish. Let your give of love grow like you want your relationship to grow. These plants also serve as reminders to your mate how wonderful you think they are. The nice part is you can give plants to both male and female partners without any of the stereo type thinking. Go out today and purchase a love shrub for your mate and then watch it grow like your love for each other.

Get your sex sound track ready.

Your sex life is a wonderful passionate journey that the two of you share together. We don't often think about outside influences that could improve this connection. When we do we think of sex toys, lubes or even costumes. Have you ever thought about the music you can play in the background as being a enhancer to your sex life. Music is a powerful force in our life and I don't know of many people if any that say they can't relate to music. Even deaf people can feel the vibration of music. So why not bring that into our bedroom to help our passion. Think of native american drums, or music with amazing beat to it and how that can get your blood pumping which is a good thing in intimacy. How about Egyptian music to give your sacred place a different feel. Try out many different kinds of music and see how it chances your sex life. Now you can put another playlist on your ipod.

Pay attention to your dreams.

I am hear to tell you to you dreams are interesting things that can give you insight to things that might happen in your life. I am not saying that every dream is a fortune telling item that will bring your and your partner great wealth. However, there is some meaning in some of your dreams. Hopefully your relationship with your partner is your most important one so pay attention to your dreams when they involve both of you. If you dream is about something you are doing for your partner or you partner is in your dream, then you might need to put a little check into your relationship. Maybe your dream is telling you this and if not it never hurts to put a little extra into your relationship. Next time you dream is about the two of you in some manner put some thought into what it might mean you might just be surprised at how much you can learn from your dreams in a round about way.

Why in the hell are you holding back your love.

We are all on guard with our hearts we want to protect them from getting broken. Thusly so many people hold back the love they could be showering their partner with. There feeling is that if they hold their love back they won't get hurt if the relationship goes sour. This is a sure way to start that trend of your relationship turning sour. Your partner will start to sense you are not putting your full effort into the relationship. This will make them start to feel as if you don't care as much as you do. Jealously will start to rise up as well as all other sorts of problems simply because you are not putting your full effort into the relationship. You will then start blaming your partner for doubting you love and yet tis you that give this reason of doubt. Try a little experiment and get fully of your love and see what happens. Touch your partner whenever you get a chance, call them just to say I love you, hold their hand as you are walking places and make mad passionate love to them as often as you can. Look in their eyes as you tell them you love them, let them see you true love. Then see how those problems start to melt away and you get more special feelings in return. Guarding your heart is fine if you don't want to love anyone!

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Massage is an answer.

You know most couples don't understand how much a massage can help a relationship. I am not talking about one you pay $100 dollars for. I am talking about rubbing your partners shoulders or their back. Even a foot massage can be wonderful. Although the massage feels wonderful the important part is what it can offer. It allows you the time to talk to each other. Starting conversations while you are massaging can open the door to deep and meaningful conversations. You can also use it as a meditation to clear both your minds because you can get relaxation from giving or receiving. However the most important part is enjoying the touch of a massage. Make sure to engage the skin of each other. Let your love flow into each other as you kneed the skin of your partner. Most people don't understand that touch is very important to our well being and without it we are missing something in our life. Now as good as it feels when you are getting the massage make sure to reciprocate the feeling to your partner, it is only fair.

Fights sometimes they are good?????? WTF

Yes we all have disagreements and even loud yelling fights from time to time. If you think other couples don't have them they you are very much mistaken. The thing that divides the couples on this is how they view them. Couples that are close understand that a disagreement or an fight doesn't mean that they don't love each other. They don't question the love. They take the argument in stride and understand that it is part of the relationship. After they air their concerns they don't dwell on the fight they let it go and get back to being a couple. This is where the make up is ohhhhhh so good. Understand that if you think you relationship is going to be a fairy tale then you need to think again.

Healing Sex

If you have nagging problems that keep you just off you best, then sex might just be the answer. Many studies have shown that coupes that have what would be considered a wonderful sex life, tend to have less health problems then those that don't. Science tells us that it is because of the chemicals that are released during sex, they give us that boost to stay healthier and have less stress. However I feel that those are very valid points and I understand the effects of dopamine and oxytocin. My thoughts are that when we are in a special relationship with that partner we share more then just pleasure during intimacy. We share each others energy we share our qualities and we form a super connection. It think that this is why people who are sexually happy are not as sick as others. They have two peoples energy fighting off the things that annoy us. When you have passionate intimacy you carry part of our lover with you for a few days. Instead of losing part of yourself you both enjoy the benefits of carrying both your energies around. This is like a force field and protects you. That is why I feel couples that make love on a regular basis are guarded from the effects of these annoying things. Try it out and see what you think. If you make the commitment I feel you will soon start reaping the rewards plus it just feels good to.

Wirte down interesting things to talk about.

Here is a practice I am getting into. I take a notebook along with me, one small enough to fit in my back pocket. When I have a thought or see something interesting that happens to or around me during the day I jot it down. Then latter in the evening with I am home and with my partner I share these things with her. Not saying my memory isn't that great but sometimes you loose the feeling of the moment when you try to remember what happened. With your notes it will jog your mind back to the place and time that it happened or the thought popped into your head. Plus it make for great conversation. Give it a try and see what happens you might find yourself writing more and more things down as you get comfortable with it. In my opinion it will add fuel to the fire of your relationship.