Kiss and Tell

Society dictates that we are supposed to keep our love lives to ourselves. I believe that to be pretty much true with some exceptions. Some of those might be talking to a professional to get advice or help keeping your relationship alive. Medical reasons also might be a reason that you explain your current state of intimacy. I'm not talking about things that are causing your relationship troubles. Kiss and tell to me is more about communication then blabbing to your best friend about how great or inadequate your lover performs.

Kiss and tell is between the two of you. If you don't do this now, you should start as soon as possible. All it involves it telling your partner what you like and the things you can do without. I am always quick to tell my partner when something feels good, whether we are in the middle of sexual activities or if we are just out somewhere alone or in a group. You have to open up to your partner and share your feelings. I know that I want to make my special someone feel the best they can. To do that I need input and I don't mean hints, I mean tell me damn it. If I reach down and hold your hand during a scary movie and you enjoy that tell me. If I squeeze your bottom at the family reunion and you feel uncomfortable with that let me know, don't get mad - just explain it to me. When we are in the middle of sex and I am doing something great for heaven’s sakes tell me or at least say yes yes YES.

It sounds so simple I know, but some people really have a hard time telling others what they want in a relationship. I have some suggestions to help these people, kiss and tell. For starters work out some sort of signal to let the other person know your feelings. In the bedroom if you are enjoying what your partner is doing then work out a signal for that, like squeezing his/her shoulders or running your fingers through his/her hair. This trigger gets you over that communication hump by avoiding having to say anything. Another way to avoid speaking about your sexual needs is to right them down for the other person to read when you are not around. Leave him/her a card that says I really loved it last night when you... you can even email him/her if no one else as access to his/her email. If you have a toy or specific item you would like to try in bed then order it and have it sent to your partner. Believe me he/she will get the hint.

This kiss and tell works both ways so don't ignore your partner when he/she tells you he/she likes something you do. Take it as a compliment. Don't think of it as shameful. Passion between two people is very special and at least nowadays we are beginning to get that more out in the open. It is proven that sex helps you live longer and feel better and now at least people are telling us we should enjoy it. Thank goodness we are finally out of the stone age.