One thing every person knows is that intimacy and sex is important in a relationship. However, so many couples use it as a bargaining tool. Both sides are to blame. Remember when you started dating and the passion and intimacy just happened. Some how when we become life partners we forget about that. We let things like work, kids, and countless other things get in the way of the freedom we had in our intimacy. Yet we do nothing about it. We hear things like "Well if you helped more around the house, I might be in the mood more" or "Well if you didn't let yourself go, I would be more attracted to you again" These things hurt and are most definitely not good for a relationship. Never should you put a tag on your love life, that should be a mutual exchange of the love between the two of you, not just a chore. You can't force sex and you can't ignore sex, it has to be in a relationship to make both partners happy. The passion has to come back and you have to compromise or you just end up becoming roommates. Use this exercise to help you get over you stipulations on sex, think about the wonderful things your partner does, think about the wonderful times you have had together, and relive all those feelings. Do you want to create more of them? Well think back what was going on in your life when they happened, most likely there was a lot of passion between the two of you????? Are you getting the picture make it a point to woe each other again, get excited about having a date together, kiss when you come home from work, these little things will start to manifest your desire for each other and soon you won't have to worry about it the passion will take care of itself.
u have problems in your relationship? Who doesn't, but the way you handle them could make the difference between a break up and relationship to die for. When you have a problem with your partner what do you do? Do you constantly badger them to get them to change? Troubles in a relationship takes effort from both partners. Compromises must be met to keep the relationship strong and healthy. Baring anything illegal you should be prepared to make compromises to make the most of your relationship. Do you have a partner that likes to stay out late with his/her friends. Well making them quite that cold turkey will only make them resent this action. Set limits that you both can live with, if they want to go out with friends one night them make them take you for a special evening before they meet up with their friends again. This type of action says I don't want to change you but I want us to work out. Same thing if you partner wants to have intimate relationships with you more then you want. The both of you should come to an agreement and you should stick to it. If you are not willing to put effort into your problems then you are not truly giving your relationship a fair shake. It is easy to sit back and tell someone what you want them to do but you can't feel how they view it or how much it hurts them to be told that what they feel is wrong. If you need help dealing with issues their are many qualified persons available to help in your relationship, so don't be afraid to seek help that might save your relationship.