Oral Sex Makes for Happy Sex!

Believe it or not but some couples have never had oral sex? Yes this is true and I am not knocking them but I wonder, WHY? Oral sex is a great way to break up the routine of your sex life plus it is one of the greatest ways to increase your foreplay. You can both take turns performing oral sex on each other or enjoy it at the same time. There are many books on the subject out there with great techniques and ideas to make in mind blowing. Maybe you are a little scared and I understand that but get over that hump and a magical kingdom awaits you and your partner. Oral sex is a great way to extend your sexual intimacy and bring you closer together. There is not reason you cannot partake in oral sex, what ever you problem is there is a solution. The best way to find out what works best for you is for you both to use the trial and error method. Communicate what feels good and what doesn't. Maybe you don't like talking during intimacy and if that is the case set up signals for each other. Tell you partner you will start rubbing their head if it feels good and that you will cough if it doesn't those are simple signs that can't be mistaken. I recently listen to a podcast on the subject and the trend is that oral sex is now considered part of a normal round of intimacy. That means if your not experiencing or enjoying oral sex you are missing the boat. I am throwing you a life jacket grab it slip it on and start pleasuring your lover and let them pleasure you in an oral manner.

Monday Morning Blues!

Monday's always seem to bring about the blues. Maybe it is back to work or the fact that the weekend is over, but Monday just gets a bum rap. In our relationships Monday is the day that is least likely to have anything special going on. Why don't we try to spice Monday up a little and get your week started right. Plan things for Monday that might make this day zoom by a little quicker. Maybe you start going out to dinner on Mondays. Monday would be a great date night because there wouldn't be as long of lines at the restaurants, the movies or other entertainment venues. That could give you something to look forward to on Mondays. Get up a little early and start your week out with a little morning sex to get the ball rolling. The excitement will make your day start out with a bang instead of a blah. Whatever your tastes you can dress your Mondays up a little thus making the week and your relationship start out on a better note.

Turn the tables from time to time.

Are you the one in the relationship the initiates sex most often? If not then it is time you turn the tables a little and surprise your lover. It doesn't take a lot of effort and you don't even have to spend much time in preparation if you don't want to. Just make sure that they know you are the one that wants to make love! You can set a mood by getting some candles out or putting new sheets on the bed. You can wear something sexy or nothing at all really gets the point across. Let yourself get comfortable with wanting your partner, desire is a strong feeling that when you are open to it can bring you to the highest of highs. Get them thinking about it early by sending the an "I want you" text message, so that their motor is running and they will seek you out when you get home. You can also use the surprise attack and jump them when they least expect it. No matter how you do it make sure it makes a lasting impression on them. Lastly I just want to say don't wait so long to do it! Getting a balance in who initiates the intimacy in your relationship goes a long way to balancing your relationship in general. We all want that control and we have to learn to share it. If you are in love with your partner then you should have no problem being the aggressor or the receiver of the aggressive passion. After all it will help mix things up and keep them interesting.

Lift your man up!

Ladies if you haven't learned this by now you might not ever. Men think about sex a lot. This is our nature we desire it, we fantasize about it, and we want it all the time. Back up a bit that last little part isn't quite true. Men want sex all the time isn't exactly true we want it until we can have it. Our mind it focused on it until we reach that golden ring. I did a little experiment recently and found that once I had sex I was able to focus more on other tasks be it at work or home more easily for about two days. Once that third day hit my mind started telling me to think about sex again. Which got me thinking, it we had sex every three days my wife would never be able to tell me that all I think about is sex! I read somewhere that most really successful men have a lot it common but one of those things is that they never had to worry about was sex. They said their partner was always there for them in that capacity. Then in another article I read it said that couples that have more sex are happier and live longer. Are you starting to see the trend like I am. Ladies here is my feeling after I read these two articles. If you want your man to be successful, happy and healthy all you have to do is have sex with him on a normal basis so that it doesn't preoccupy his mind. Without having to worry about when he is going to have sex again, or what he can do to get more sex he will be free to think about things like improving his career, fixing up things around the house, and even doing more non-sexual romantic things.

This epic battle of men and women over sex, shouldn't be a battle at all it should be a compromise to benefit your relationship. Men I suggest trying you own little experiment and see how long sex releases it's grip from you mind after you have it. Be honest with yourself and your partner as to when that craving for sex starts to creep back in. Sex everyday is a wonderful thought but it isn't the compromise that most couples make and frankly I don't know if I would actually like to have sex everyday. That might become boring and I never want my sex to become boring. Talk with your partner about this and let them know you are trying to find the compromise that will make you both happy, if they get mad about that then they aren't really putting the effort into your relationship that you both really need.

Sandals - Shoes for Lovers

Summer time is great for lots of things but one of my favorite things about summer is being able to wear sandals. Sandals are the most romantic footwear that was ever created. There are plenty of sexy shoes out their with stiletto heels and feathery pumps. However, we are talking romantic shoes here. Sandals are quick to put on and off, which allows you to save time when getting ready. They are comfortable and show off your sexy feet and toes, which will really excite you if you have a foot fetish. They also allow your feel to get air to them and on those hot summer days concealed feet can get pretty stinky. Most of the sandals you pick for summer can also get wet so you don't have to worry if you want to step into a kiddy pool or play in the rain. Plus sandals just have that relaxed feel to them, they are like vacation for your feet. If you don't have great sandals then today is the best day to go out and get some. Then see how romantic they make you feel wearing them around.

Afterplay?

We have all heard of foreplay as it is essential to our sex life. Have you ever thought about afterplay? Sex shouldn't just end after climax you need to cool down just like you need to warm up. Afterplay can be as simple as holding each other or caressing the skin lightly. Afterplay is something that could defiantly benefit your relationship, forming a strong bond at a time when you are accepting of it. I suggest being a little more hands on during afterplay everyone is a little sensitive in their genital region after they orgasm but give it a little time then caress that area, also. Don't be afraid of the fluids that you have expelled during your love making it is safe and okay to play in it. Massaging the outer parts of your partners genitals can be relaxing when there is not the need to become aroused. Heck with a little luck and a willing partner afterplay could become foreplay all over again.

Other things you might consider as afterplay bonding is getting a snack to replenish both of you, fruits work wonderful here. A shower together is a wonderful form of afterplay that not only makes you closer but also gets you clean. Afterplay could even be important if you partner might want to have another orgasm and you just can't. Always remember that sex isn't just over once the deed is done because this time is when you love can become so much stronger.

Women First!

We all know that chivalry is almost dead. Partly because people are selfish now and partly because women don't want to be made to feel like they are less then men. What ever the reason you shouldn't take it into your bedroom. By this I mean you should focus on the woman's sexual needs first then the mans. Why you might ask? Simple it takes the woman much longer to heat up sexually then the man in most cases. She needs to be heated up much like you heat your oven before you cook in it. Men on the other hand and ready to go as soon as the clothes hit the floor, so they are like a microwave. This is why we focus on the women first giving them time to enjoy the whole intimacy. Gone are the days when the guy finishes and rolls over to go to sleep. The women need satisfaction, too. Not all women need to orgasm to enjoy sex but you still need to give them that chance. I suggest always start by focusing on the woman's enjoyment, men you know you will be ready when she is so just be a little patient. The more you warm her up the better your cooking will be.

Now if you in a same sex relationship then you just have to decide who takes longer and start with them.

Anal Play

Anal play is an often over looked aspect of love making. People think it will be dirty or that it is wrong. Well I am here to tell you that it can heighten you love making beyond the norm. There are an extreme amount of nerve ending around the anus thus making it a pleasure center. Several people find that anal stimulation during sex is a real turn on. If you are uncomfortable with insertion just playing or rimming the anus is a stimulation that can make your sex more exciting. Butt Plugs are a great addition to anyones sexual arsenal but make sure anything you are sticking up your butt has a flared base. Taking a trip to the hospital to retrieve that vibrator could be a little embarrassing. When you first start to experiment with anal play make sure to take it slow and use lots of lubrication. Your butt doesn't lubricate itself so lubrication is a must for you anal play. Stop when ever there is pain and remove inserted items slowly as a safety feature. Guys don't be afraid of this it does not make you a homosexual if you enjoy anal play plus it might give you some insight into why some men enjoy being homosexual. If you have ever hear of milking your prostate then this is the way to get to that area. Milking the prostate while some find it most enjoyable is also a great way to protect yourself from prostate problems later on. Together you should search the net and find some toys to play with or use your best item, that being your fingers. Again make sure to pick up lots of your favorite lubrication and have at it. Enjoy and believe me you won't be disappointed.

Click our side bar to go to Eden Fantasys for the best anal toys available.

Make your feeling known by using signs.

It is hard to figure out men and it is hard to figure out women. Now throw in a wonderful relationship and you have to constantly try to figure things out. There is a great way to inform you partner of you wants or desires without just blurting them out. Some people are uncomfortable with just speaking their feelings, but since this is the best way to get your feelings across, what do you do? Well I want to suggest making up signs for things so that you partner doesn't have to guess what you want or desire. You can have as many of these signs as you want just make sure they are clear and to the point for you mate. For instance if you are feeling like a little intimacy hang your bra or underwear on the bedroom door. Once you partner sees this they know you intentions and don't have to wonder if your in the mood or not. Say you feel like going on a date, you could lay out the movie ads with your keys placed on them. Maybe you need some alone time, then borrow a do not disturb sign from a hotel and give that to your partner so they know you don't want to be disturbed. You can make up as many of these bold statements as you want and you might just find that you partner will do the same. You will eliminate the asking over and over again for things. Plus you will get right to the point when you want something.

Is it my turn?

One thing we find interesting in our relationship is that we both like to be the aggressor in our sex life. This presents a little problem as we both get a rush being the one that initiates sex. As fun as it might sound you both can be the aggressor at the same time. That's like both of you trying to lead during dancing. The simple solution to this problem is to take turns being the aggressor. Don't pick a specific date but just make every other time a switch to the other persons time to be the aggressor. Sex is powerful and the rush you get from taking your partner in your arms to initiate the actions. Hard kisses that tell the other person what you have in mind, or leading your partner by the hand to the bedroom and shutting the door are a couple of ways that get this point across. Being the less aggressive partner isn't all bad but being the passive one all the time really sucks. Make sure both partners get to prowl for sex within your relationship. Their is something about getting that look in your eye and the raw emotions of being aggressive when it come to getting the intimacy you want.

Read something that inspires you.

Reading is one of the best things you can do. Not only for yourself but for your relationship, also. Once a month pick a book that either has something to do with an added area of your relationship or a self help type of book. Not that you have to follow the suggestions of the book word for word or make a complete lifestyle change. However I am sure you can find bits and pieces of the book that you might enjoy in your life. Things like tantric practices, building self esteem, ways to improve conversations, are great ideas when you are searching for books. If you are on a budget you can find older book in bargain bins or Amazon.com has lots of books that basically you purchase for a penny and just pay the shipping and handling on. Click on our amazon side bar and find a book that is just right for you. What I like about amazon is their search feature. Just type in a suggestion and you will soon have thousands of books to choose from. Your library is another option but in my dealings with our local library is that they tend to shy away from books about things having to do with sex, and or relationships issues. If you have lots of friends that read you can even start a book co-op where you all purchase a book then put it into the community for anyone to read after you finish it. By reading different things we keep our minds open to things the might really help our relationship down the line or at the current time. You can either read the book together or apart. If you are reading a book leave it out so that your partner can see what you are reading. This act alone will spark some conversations that might get you both thinking a little differently.

Don't feel like sex, then be a fan.

You know not all the times do our libidos match up. Sometimes one of us is in the mood while the other isn't. It is not wrong if you don't want to have sex and your partner does. In the same way it is not wrong to want sex if you partner doesn't. Well what can you do to keep you both happy. If you are the person that doesn't want to have sex at this time, encourage them to masturbate in front of you so you can watch. This might sound a little unusual but it is a way for you to both get what you want. With different libidos we have to get creative so that neither one of you feel left out or pressured. Masturbation isn't cheating as some people would believe but it can be a very intimate act if you enjoy it together. Make sure to touch and watch to show your partner you care as the pleasure themselves. Afterwards you can cuddle as if you have both just had sex which will satisfy both of your desires. We have to be creative to overcome differences in libidos but with a little effort it can take on a life of it's own.

Click the above link to Eden Fantasy's for some amazing toys.

How much focus do you put in your relationship?

Do you put much focus in your relationship? Are you always looking for things to make it better or are you like the millions that just let it happen. Well I am here to tell you that if you think your relationship just gets better with age, you are wrong. If you talk to couples that have great relationships you will find a common factor they are always looking for something to challenge or inspire their relationship. It might be a new activity for them to share or a trip to a different location. Experimenting with intimacy or finding different date ideas can make your relationship keep that spark that it had in the beginning. You should think about your relationship everyday because it is a constant living breathing part of your life. Even if it is a little as making sure to give that special kiss before leaving for work. Our relationship is the basis for all our happiness when you have a great relationship and it thrives the rest of your life will follow. So put your relationship at the top of your list today and everyday.

Change your time for Sex!

Do you always have sex at the same time? Are you bedtime people and that is the only time that you will make love? Well I want to suggest making a time change. Try making love at a different time of the day then normal. I like to call it vacation sex. Breaking out of your routine might make your love making a little more exciting. Plus by being open to different times you allow yourself to avoid issues that might keep you from having sex all together. When the kids are at school is a time that is seldom used for sex, but allows you the freedom of not being interrupted or having to wait for the older kids to go to bed. Also you don't have to worry about being tired or the differences in your sleeping schedules.

Morning sex is the best for some people it gives them a great start to their day. It's like getting up and doing your exercises before you shower. I would suggest this to anyone that likes to got to bed really early. The only problem with morning sex is the death breath you collect during the night but that can easily be cured with a trip to the bathroom or now they have the little portable toothbrushes that you could sit right on your headboard.

I don't care when you enjoy having your sex, night time, afternoon, morning they are all wonderful times that have their own unique positive qualities. What I want to say is don't put off having sex if the time you enjoy is not available for some reason then pretend your on vacation and have vacation sex anytime you can find.

Sex in a relationship is much more then it appears.

Within a loving and mutual relationship sex takes on a whole new meaning. It isn't just a pleasure of the flesh it becomes a ritual of love and a dance of the souls. Think about how you feel after you make love to your partner. Most generally you are in a sense of relaxation and comfort. Next time you make love take some mental notes on how great you feel how and the power that you have connected with your partner. Within a relationship sex is a real wonder drug not only does it bring you closer to each other but it connects the power within both of you. Forming a supper being if you will. This is why I would suggest that coupes experiment with different aspects of sex. Try different positions, explore you bodies don't get stuck doing it the same way over and over. The more you find that excites you the more the charge you will get from it afterwards. Sex in a wonderful relationship has a way of slowing down time and giving you that confidence to go out and tackle the world. Few things in the life are as pleasurable as the love and passion of your partner. That is by design, that is why we search so hard for the person that is just right for us, that person that we want to find enlightenment with. Intimacy brings together all the abilities in both of you and combines them making the bond of love the greatest power in the universe.

Reading can it hurt?

Can reading hurt your relationship? Reading is a wonderful activity and is a great alternative to watching countless hours of television. However reading can detract from your relationship just as television can. If one of the other of you become more into the reading then your relationship. I am amazed at the amount of romance stories I see some people have. Walls and walls of romantic novels, what does that tell you? Someone is not getting enough romance in their life and they are getting in through the use of these books. My suggestion to them would be to start living the romance and stop thinking that it will be like the authors put it in their books. Your partner might not have the perfect body or be able to pick you up and carry you to the bedroom. If your partner is not receptive to the romance then you need to be more creative in your pursuits. Reading a book to get your romance is not the way it was intended. These romance novels are produced to sale a lot of copies which means there are loads of lonely people out their not getting the attraction that they need. Sure an occasional romance novel isn't harmful it could actually maybe getting you a little excited and ready for your own lover. However if you are thinking that things have to happen like they do in the books your are going to be disappointed. Read a book from time to time but don't forget that the person sitting in the other room can be your knight in shinning armor, just maybe with the armor.

Bored? Why not play the old fashioned game of Strip Poker!

Strip Poker has been around for years and years. However, playing a game with your partner that gets you both naked never goes out of style. Find a nice secluded place in your house at a time when you won't get interrupted and have at it. You might ask what you do if one of the two of you doesn't know how to play poker? Well first of all that is good news for the person that does know. If you want to keep it fair however pick a different game and work out a way to get naked playing it. Monopoly for example you could pick a square like community chest where instead of paying you have to remove one piece of clothing. No matter what game you like to play their is a strip version of it. Just get your creative juices flowing and figure it out. Make sure to send me you stories on which game you played and how you worked the stripping part into the game. I would love to hear about them and pass them along to our viewers. Heck tic tac toe can now become tic tac oHHHHHHH.

Time to get a little unpredictable.

Everyone at some point or time feels like it the sex in their relationship gets a little predictable. The same things happen over and over you begin to form a pattern. Partially because you find out what each other likes and partially because your afraid to try some different things. There are so many different things to try out there that your sex life should never get mundane. Get on the internet or go to the bookstore together and find a book or two that might help you get our of the routine sex. Role playing is a great way to snap out of the normal and bring some excitement to the bedroom. Don't worry about being silly just do it be the plumber and the horny housewife, or the school teacher and student. Get some laugher into the bedroom. The great people at Sex is Fun have a new game out that challenges you to be unpredictable and by some great idea that is the name of the game. We here at The Couples Spot have produced our own way to get you out of your sexual rut and you can find our way buy Clicking her to go to our Sexy Challenges Page. Our challenges give you specific missions to complete that will get you closer intimately and make sure you score at the end of the night.

Shower together.

One of the most intimate things you can do together is take a shower with each other. Sure it is not the easiest way to take a shower, but we are not talking about your morning shower before work. We are talking about a long hot shower with lots of soap sharing and taking turns washing each other. The beauty of the taking a shower together is it lets you see each other naked, when you are in bed together you miss that imagery. Be sexy and enjoy the warm water the warm bodies and the touch. OH those soapy touches where you hands glide over each other, ummmh that is pure delight. The images of soap running down a curvy body sends shivers down my spine. You might also think about shower sex but that is a bit challenging depending on the heights of each other, but it is worth a try just make sure to be safe. Slips and falls in the shower can drastically change your mood. Let each other wash the others erogenous zones and sit back and enjoy the feeling. As a kicker let the other person wash your hair it is a relaxing experience that will loosen you up right from the start. Last thing make sure you have the biggest fluffiest towels that you have in the house to rap up in after the shower because with all that heat in your shower it will be very cold once you get out.

Don't save passion for special occasions.

Special occasions deserve special treatment, but if your saving your passion for these times you are missing out on the joys of being in love. Passion is not a reward it is a living breathing thing that need to be feed everyday. You don't have to attack each other everyday but you can put it into the way you kiss each other. Holding hands is another great way to show passion in a normal setting without being naked. Now when you have sex you can let your passions run wild but think of other times to be passionate each and everyday. Say kind things to each other, when no one is looking grab your partners rear end and give it a quick squeeze, the more you do to build and feed your passion the better it will be when you get behind closed doors.