7 New Year's Resolutions for Couples

7 New Year's Resolutions for Couples (YES, for Couples - Try It!)

By Jeffrey Herring

Do couples ever make resolutions for their relationship?

Here at the time of New Year's Resolutions, and at any time, it sure seems like a good ides for couples to make resolutions for their relationship.

To that end, here are 7 suggestions for Couple Resolutions:

1) Remember first attractions - It's so easy in the general messiness of living with another person to forget about what attracted you to each other in the first place. This would be a good list to make and a good conversation to have every know and then.

It's been said by my favorite author (Author Unknown) that "When you are up to your neck in alligators, it's hard to remember the original objective was to drain the swamp."This applies here big time.

2) Fight for relationship - Couples fight sometimes. That's just part of the territory. So since you are going to fight, why not decide in advance what to for, yes? I suggest fighting for the relationship. Most folks fight to be right. Fight for the relationship.

3) Live below your means - Now I've gone from preaching to meddling, right? The happiest couples I know are not necessarily the richest couples I know. The happiest couples I know are those without significant money worries. The best way to achieve this is to live below your means.

4) Know love language - In what way does your partner best experience and feel loved? Is it actions like acts of service? Is it words? Is it being touched?

The best way to find out is to ask.

5) Speak love language - Once you know the love language of your partner, speak it. Radical notion I know, but it works. The temptation is to speak in our own love language. Often that is not the language of our partner. Know it and speak it.

6) Daily time together - I don't care if it's just 15 minutes. Couple need this time to keep the connection strong. In the hustle and bustle of each day, couple time is often the first thing to go. Schedule it if you have to, just make sure you get it in.

7) Regular date night - This could be the best couple resolution of all. You dated when you were getting together. Why stop? A regular date night allows you to spend quality couple time together, and gives you something to look forward to each week or month.

Bonus Tip - Think a regular date night could get expensive? You're right. Think a regular date night has to be expensive? You're wrong.

Check out Oprah expert Michael Webb's 300 Creative Dates for great inexpensive and creative date ideas. Just visithttp://GreatDatesDoneCheap.com to plan your next fun and inexpensive date.

Brought to you by Syndicated Relationship Columnist Jeffrey Herring- keeping it simple in relationships.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jeffrey_Herring

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Does Your Partner Feel Special?

What have you done today to make your partner feel special?

Each day you should wake up and find a way to make your partner feel special.  It could be as simple as leaving a note saying, "I Love You"  You don't have to break the bank to make them feel special.  Just think about what your partner like and make sure they get to experience it.  You might just be amazed at home much it will start to make your relationship better.  

Not in the mood?... put some effort into trying.

There is the old standard that is present in each and every relationship where the mood effects your whole level of intimacy. If one partner isn't in the mood for a sexual encounter the other is just out of luck. While this is certainly the choice of one partner most sex experts state that if you put a little effort into it your mood will soon chance. Try it some time and see what happens. The next time your not in the mood for intimacy express that to your partner but ask if they will lay naked with you and talk. Get snuggled down together so that you can feel each others body. Caress each others skin and talk about dreams the two of you have together. Touch each others genitals in a soft and stroking manner as you converse. Then kiss each other softly at first and then build them up to more and more passionate. See what happens, most of the time you might just find your mood shifting and your juices will start flowing. However if that is not the case then the closeness and conversation has been a plus. However I think ninety percent of the time you mood will be affected and you will change your mind on your mood. Take time and enjoy the foreplay and the building it is part of the sexual experience. Think of it this way if you say I am not in the mood actually what you are saying is I'm not putting the effort into it tonight! Is that fair to your partner? And, is it fair to you and your relationship?

Effort, Imagination and Love can work miracles.

Love flows were attention goes.

Do you love your partner? I am sure most of you that are visiting this blog are saying, yes. However do you honor them with your love or do you just say it. When is the last time you just laid it on the line and did something unselfish for them. Not wanting anything in return just to tell them you love them. When is the last time you brought flowers home, or left a little love note for them to read. When is the last time you sent them a sexy little email or seduced them while they were not expecting it. Make a shift to start doing this at least once a week if not more often. Not only does it make your partner feel important and appreciated it also helps to build a strong relationship. Because trust me if your partner loves you as much as you love them then soon that attention to love will start flowing towards you.

Getting through tough days in your relationship.

Every relationship has days that you seem like you are unappreciated or that you don't get exactly what you want. This is normal and everyone feels that way from time to time. This is the time that you need to count your blessings. Yes, I mean literally counting your blessings. Sit down and thing about the things that your partner does that are important to you, or that just make you feel good. You quickly start to balance out those negative thoughts you are having with positive ones. Soon the scale will be tipped in the favor of the positive thoughts as your mind starting thinking of the more detailed things. Things like making you dinner, or doing the laundry, or that time he/she made passionate love to you last week. This is how you keep those negative thoughts in check. Once you start to compare them to the wonderful things you partner does you will quickly put your uneasiness to rest.

Make your bed a special place.

Your bed is obviously the most intimate place in your house. This is where the majority of your sexual contact takes place. However, you can use it as so much more. I know in our house we use it as a forum for great talks, an area for massages, and even as an entertainment venue as we watch silly things on the computer. Things you should not bring into your bed are trouble from work, issues about money, or anything negative. Don't allow negative energy into your bed. Keep your bed as a shrine to happiness and love. Leave all the other baggage on the floor as you enter the place of sanctitude and love.

Don't forget to be friends in your relationship.

One of the biggest problems I feel happen in a relationship is that we lose sight of how important our friendship is with each other. We become a couple and now we aren't friends any longer we become partners and lovers. We forget that we had a make a bond first and that was becoming friends. We did things together, we talked, we enjoyed each others company, so why should we stop doing those things. We can still have intimacy, take on the daily tasks of living and be friends. Why do so many couples not get this! Set up dates have nights of fun laughing until the sun comes up, start remembering what it was like to build that friendship during the very early part of your relationship. I am sure if you think back that if the friendship wasn't there your relationship wouldn't be where it is today? Think about that for a while and you will see just how important remaining friends is.

Monday Morning Blues!

Monday's always seem to bring about the blues. Maybe it is back to work or the fact that the weekend is over, but Monday just gets a bum rap. In our relationships Monday is the day that is least likely to have anything special going on. Why don't we try to spice Monday up a little and get your week started right. Plan things for Monday that might make this day zoom by a little quicker. Maybe you start going out to dinner on Mondays. Monday would be a great date night because there wouldn't be as long of lines at the restaurants, the movies or other entertainment venues. That could give you something to look forward to on Mondays. Get up a little early and start your week out with a little morning sex to get the ball rolling. The excitement will make your day start out with a bang instead of a blah. Whatever your tastes you can dress your Mondays up a little thus making the week and your relationship start out on a better note.

Who loves you baby?

Have you took inventory lately of how much your partner does for you? Do they go the extra mile for you? Does he/she do things that allow you to be the person you want to be? Does he/she give you massages, does he/she do the dishes for the family, or does he/she take care of the kids so that you can go play golf? These are just a few examples of what you could put on your inventory list. Take a moment and list ten things you partner does that you feel helps you out? Now can you think of ten things that you do for them? Does your list come up a little short? If so then YOU need to take some action to balance it up. Relationships are always give and take but if you are taking more then you are giving the balance is off and the relationship will tilt. We need this balance to have a happy and healthy relationship. Do this everyday and you will soon start seeing that you make sure to balance the give and take. It is only fair to your partner and you. It always feels good when your partner does something special for you but there is a great pride that you will feel when you do something special for them. Take this is heart and balance out your relationship today.

Pack your partner a love bag!

Does you partner have a commute to work? Maybe they have a long drive coming up. If this is the case then make them a little travel bag for them to have for their commute or trip. For example back this bag with their favorite healthy snacks, their favorite music and change for drinks on the trip. This little gesture will score hug point for you when your partner returns home. You can put anything in the bag they can use on their drive as long as it isn't dangerous for them. So don't back a magazine because they can't read that on the drive. Maybe a audio book or a picture you can stick by the speedometer. A special note taped to the steering wheel for them to read as they leave is another great way to show them you care. Find your own style and make your partners drive a little less stressful.

"You have to love with both hands"

A wonderful thing happened today. My wonderful partner and I were lying in bed when our three year old son came in to join us. As usual he crawled between us and snuggled down. My partner reached across him to touch me. Our son started to fidget and pushed at the arm laying across him. My partner exclaimed, "I am trying to love on Daddy, too" To this our wonderful son said "You can't love like that you have to use both hands" He turned over and wrapped his arms around me and kissed me. It was one of those tender moments that you will remember forever. Then something just as wonderful happened. My partner got up and went around the bed and got in on the other side and wrapped her arms around me and asked our son, "Like this" It was one of the most touching days of my life. Snuggled between the woman I love and the wonderful son we have made my heart sing.

This might not see that important to a lot of people. To me however it shows that we are teaching our son the right way to love. He told us that we have to put all we can into our love and that was an amazing thing to come out of a three year old's mouth. It make me smile because I know where he is learning such things from and it is the love that my partner and I share.

Pass something back and forth.

Sometimes we need a little something that shows the care our partner has for us. We need this physical thing to touch and enjoy while they are not around. My partner and I have a wonderful little heart shaped rock that we pass back and forth depending on who needs the most love. When I have a big day ahead with lots of things coming at me my partner will make sure I slip our heart rock into my pocket before leaving. On a day when my partner is having a lot of stress or things are bothering her I slip our heart rock into her hand. This simple little gesture makes things so much more right in the world. Holding or touching that heart rock lets both of us know that the other one is with is in our hearts as we are challenged by the day. Yours doesn't have to be a rock it can be anything. A special coin, a trinket from a trip, or a special token the point is that this item carries the love you have for each other and is a reminder of that. You can't be with your partner when they have troubles outside you house all the time but with your own heart rock you love will surround them.

To listen is a marvelous gift. but don't forget about the one listening.

Sometimes we get way to one sided in our relationship. We feel that our feelings are the only ones that matter. When we get in that shape sometimes we forget about our partner and their goings on. When we have a major event happen in our life we tend to shut down and worry about that leaving our partner out in the cold. The love doesn't stop we just focus on ourself a this point. This however can make our partner feel not important or like they come after all the other crap that is going on. When you find yourself in this spot take a moment and remind yourself that the person helping you get through all these troubles deserves to be appreciated also. Just the acknowledgement of them is better than nothing but to really make it up to them dedicate a day to them. Reminding them that they are special for helping you deal with your troubles. The last thing you want is your partner feeling like they are less important than you dealing with the problems in our lives. Make sure you partner knows how much you love the fact they are helping you deal with your life.

Making love for good luck!

There is a very special bond between a couple that they don't share with anyone else. That is the bond of intimacy and this is way more powerful then you can imagine. I cannot get into all the details and studies that show why intimacy between a couple are magical because it would take up all the space we have available. Intimacy between a loving couple is a bond that is can bring enlightenment and power to the couple as an unit. Try this the next time you have something big about to happen the next day. Maybe you are going to an interview or have a big presentation at work and you need to be your best. Well simply make mad passionate love the night before. You partner obviously has to be totally on board for this but it can make all the difference in the world. Here are my feelings on why this is good. I use the term luck in the post but I don't believe that it is luck. I believe by being intimate together you form a bond that makes both of you stronger and you take to battle all the qualities of both of you. I think this energy lasts for about 2 days but it is amazing. Your confidence is better, you feel better, you have an aura of success around you. This is the amazing union two people can create. Plus the feeling is unbeatable. Try this next time you need things to go your way and see just how much it makes a difference. I will talk more about this topic later because it is becoming a passion within our relationship.

Don't forget to say thanks.

Thanks for cleaning the kitchen honey, let me show you how much I appreciate it.

Being in a relationship is great for the simple fact that there are two of you to get things done. You partner can do things for you when you are unable and vice versa. You can even ask them to do things when they have time and they are usually going to do them for you. Love is funny in that manner. The problem arises when these helpful things go unnoticed or unappreciated. That is when chores or helpfulness seems more like orders then helping out. Appreciate the things your partner does and don't always take the easy way out and say "Thank You" Do something special for that person and in return you are going to get a lot more help when you need it. Take your partner out to a wonderful dinner after a day of them running errands for the two of you. Pick up the book they have been wanting to read as a token of your appreciation. Offer up a massage at the end of the day and express your appreciation while you make them feel good. My favorite however is to slip into something sexy or fill your bedroom with candle light and find a way orgasmically to thank them. Love is such a special thing and the last thing you want is your partner feeling unappreciated, so make sure to whisper softly in their ear, "Thank You"

Get in touch with your body before you try to get in touch with your partners.

Our bodies give us so much information that we don't take seriously at many times. I am sure you have heard the expressions, "Women's Intuition" or "Gut reaction" these are way our body tries to tell us that something is not just right with what we are doing. I have heard stories about men and women that have had such strong reaction to these feelings that it changes there approach. Only to find out later that something bad would have happened had they went the other way. We have to learn to trust our own bodies and then start trusting the feelings our partner gets in the same manner. The two feelings combined will create a wonderful bond for the two of you and you will learn to tell when something doesn't feel right to your partner. Together you can form a tight bond and feel the love that surrounds you.

Put a little pressure into your sex life.

Some of the most common complaint about coupes is about sex. There is not enough time, can't get in the mood, the kids are up, I'm tired, and these are just a few of the excuses people use to avoid making love. But why would you want to avoid it? there are so many health benefits to sex that is seems like you are doing your body wrong by not having sex. Plus the more you have it the better it gets and it keeps you young and healthy. No if you have been out of the practice of having sex often you need to pressure yourself into it. Start slow and let yourself build to the feeling of excitement. A little foreplay and teasing your partner will get you in the mood quicker then you waiting for it to happen on it's own. Sex can become a wonderful and exciting thing you share with your partner and all you have to do is start getting yourself in the mood. Take showers together, don't push away from kisses, let your hands rome a little while hugging are a few things you can do to make the juices start flowing. Nothing builds a relationship stronger then a good sexual relationship and not only does it build it but it makes it healthy and amazing. Studies show that couples with a strong sexual relationship live longer, are healthier, and claim to have a better relationship so why wouldn't you pressure yourself a little to have those things.

Consider your time together when looking for a new job.

One thing that slips peoples minds when they are looking for a new job is the time lost for their relationship. You relationship needs to be considered during this process as much as anything else. I have seen countless amounts of people work opposite shifts to avoid child care costs. This is great for your finances but very bad for your relationship. Sometimes I understand it is unavoidable when you are just starting a new position. Look at the way your new position will effect your relationship before saying, yes to it. Will it put stress on your relationship? Will it allow you time to have together? When will you sleep compared to your partner? These are all valid questions that need to be addressed before you take a position. Can your relationship handle it if you new position calls for you to be gone a good portion of the week? There are countless questions that can arise. Money is an obvious concern for people in this economy, however a broken relationship might cost you more then you stand to make. Weigh all your options before deciding were to apply for jobs and start with the ones that mean the most to you. I am hoping that is the love you share with that special someone.

Good things happen in bunches.

Have you ever heard the saying, "Bad things come in threes" Well I think that good things come in bunches like bananas. I have seen it happen far to often. When good things start happening the flood gates are open and the good things start flowing like a raging stream. Take heart when the bad things are happening because they only come in threes. Once the good starts happening you need to ride it like a wave and enjoy all the excitement. Bad things happen we understand that but the universe or powers above always balance it out so that you life is overall good. Enjoy your life, enjoy your love and share it with you partner.

Add a few extra words to "I Love You"

The words, "I Love You" are some of the most powerful words you can speak to your lover. Yet you can make them even more powerful by just adding a few words to them. For example "Gosh, I love you" or "You can't imagine how much, I love you" are simple yet very expressive ways of adding on to those three simple words. "I feel so blessed being able to love you" or "The most wonderful day of my life was the day you said, I love you, to me" Get creative and make it a challenge to be more expressive with your three little words. Let you expressions flow out of you like a stream down a river. You might be amazed how good it will make you feel, plus how great it will make your partner feel.