Pass something back and forth.

Sometimes we need a little something that shows the care our partner has for us. We need this physical thing to touch and enjoy while they are not around. My partner and I have a wonderful little heart shaped rock that we pass back and forth depending on who needs the most love. When I have a big day ahead with lots of things coming at me my partner will make sure I slip our heart rock into my pocket before leaving. On a day when my partner is having a lot of stress or things are bothering her I slip our heart rock into her hand. This simple little gesture makes things so much more right in the world. Holding or touching that heart rock lets both of us know that the other one is with is in our hearts as we are challenged by the day. Yours doesn't have to be a rock it can be anything. A special coin, a trinket from a trip, or a special token the point is that this item carries the love you have for each other and is a reminder of that. You can't be with your partner when they have troubles outside you house all the time but with your own heart rock you love will surround them.

Love is the answer!

We all have those times in our life where things are not going as well as they should. Our jobs suck, the kids are driving us crazy, our families are out of control what ever they problem you should always turn to your love for stability. Use your relationship with your partner as a grounding point. Turn to that love you have anytime something is bothering you or stressing you and soon the problem will pass. There is a special energy between two people in love that forms a protective barrier against painful and stressful situations. Use that energy to help guide you, do shy away from it saying you are to stressed or can handle love right now. That is a sure way to keep the stress around you. Use love and intimacy as a vitamin for your life. Love and intimacy give you the special feeling you need to put your problems into perspective and to get past them. I will be commenting more on this energy of love in future post because I think people look the wrong way when they need help. All the help you need is in your relationship and they love it holds for you. Look into you partners eyes and see how much safety there is in them.

Consider your time together when looking for a new job.

One thing that slips peoples minds when they are looking for a new job is the time lost for their relationship. You relationship needs to be considered during this process as much as anything else. I have seen countless amounts of people work opposite shifts to avoid child care costs. This is great for your finances but very bad for your relationship. Sometimes I understand it is unavoidable when you are just starting a new position. Look at the way your new position will effect your relationship before saying, yes to it. Will it put stress on your relationship? Will it allow you time to have together? When will you sleep compared to your partner? These are all valid questions that need to be addressed before you take a position. Can your relationship handle it if you new position calls for you to be gone a good portion of the week? There are countless questions that can arise. Money is an obvious concern for people in this economy, however a broken relationship might cost you more then you stand to make. Weigh all your options before deciding were to apply for jobs and start with the ones that mean the most to you. I am hoping that is the love you share with that special someone.

Are you putting enough time into your relationship????

Life is busy, with work, activities, commitments, children, and so many other things we sometimes take time away from the relationships that are most important in our life. Our partner and our children sometimes get the short end of the stick. Has this ever happened to you, crawling in bed your realize that it has been a week since you and your partner have made love or that you didn't even get to see the kids today. We can't go out and quite our jobs or forget about all the wonderful commitments we have but our relationships deserve so much more. We need to find balance in our life. We need to have an hour or more with out partner a night, finding time to enjoy them on a personal and physical level not only in important to them but to us also. If passion is missing in your bedroom then it will be missing in all other areas of your life. If friendship is missing your philanthropy will suffer. All our happiness starts with the love we have at home. Think about all the great things your partner does are you letting them know that you are grateful for those things or do you feel like they are expected to do them? If your life isn't perfect, you don't like your job, or you just seem stressed all the time then you need to do this. Put stock in your relationship, you will be amazed at how much a couple of hours a day can change your outlook not to mention your partners. In almost all relationship one partner or both feel unappreciated, do you want the person that you love the most to feel that way???

We Love BOOBS. and our lady partners.

We here at the couples spot love boobs. We think they are amazing they can be fun and exciting for both partners. They can be a complete turn on but for many woman they can be a great source of stress and concern. Breast Cancer is a serious concern for any woman, it can rob them of their life. We love our partners so as the protectors we men like to be (and some women, too) make sure you suggest to your partner to get a mammogram it might not seem like a great present to get them one for your anniversary. However showing that you care about them and giving them peace of mind goes a long way. You should also encourage then to do regular self examinations in the shower. Noticing any lumps early is the best way to combat this major killer of women. Make it part of your foreplay if you like, that way you as the partner has a hand in noticing anything different, because we know how much attention you want to show your partners breasts! We joke about this but regular breast play with your lover might help detect breast cancer very early on. The women in our lives are special beyond belief so do your part to protect them from this killer. THINK PINK.

What to do when things are going bad!

Never discuss problems in the bedroom, they should never enter your thoughts when you in this area that is designated for love.

What do you do as a couple when things are going bad in your life. These things can make it tense in your relationship and can even cause problems, which is the last things the two of you need. When things get tough the one thing you need to do as a couple is pull together. Make your relationship the rock in your rocky world right now. No matter what is going on in your life, being able to come home and be comforted and able to leave all the stress at the door is a big plus. No matter if it's problems at work, troubles with your parents, or even financial troubles. Make it a point to talk about them outside of the house and leave them their when you come back in through the door. Go out to eat and discuss your troubles over a meal,or go to the park and find a bench somewhere, or you can even just take a drive to discuss the situation. No matter what it is get it all out and talk about it before you come back home. Once home put your focus into being the couple that you are, support each other and make sure to layer on the love and affection for each other. Make your home the safe haven it should be for the two of you.

Our Stress

Once you become a couple you have to share almost everything. Stress is one of these things that has to be shared. No matter whose has the stress it creeps into both of your lives. When one partner is stressed the other will surely feel the effects of this stress. The other partner might be grouchy or upset, or they might with drawl totally form the relationship for a while. The best method to combat this is take the stress on head first. Dive into the problem that is effecting your partner and see if you can help with a solution or just be an open ear to listen. Sometimes just getting the stress out in the open is enough for your partner to start feeling less stressed. Sometimes their stress demands attraction, don't try to avoid the stress that only makes it worse on both of you. Try to come to a solution and work around it the best you can. Once the stress passes you partner will be so greatfull to you that they might treat you a little special for putting up with their stress problems. If you think you will never have stress in your relationship you are in for a big surprise. No matter how comfortable you are something somewhere, some time will bring the ugly stress monster into your life.

Financial Troubles

One of the biggest problems in relationships today is financial troubles. Not only do they weigh on the individual but they can really put a stress on your relationship. However, there is no time like the present to do something about your financial crisis before it ends up hurting your relationship. Most people will get angry at their partner when discussing this matters as you feel it is all the other persons fault. If you look at it however if you are in a committed relationship it is the couples fault. Once you get past that hurdle you can both sit down and start to hash out a plan to get you out of this mess. You might need to get more help and hire a financial consultant that can give you insight into how to address situations. Set a budget and stick to it make it a game you can even reward your partner with things such as massages, special dinners or even sex if they help to get the two of you out of debt. Most couples have gone through tough time you are not the first and will not be the last, you focus should be one correcting the situation instead of blaming anything. Amazon has a wide selection of books on the topic of getting finances back in order and you can click on the bar at the side to take you there in a hurry.

His or Her stress? In a relationship you both share the stress.

Does your partner seem to get stressed rather easily? How does it effect your relationship, are you unable to do things because your partner is to stressed, does it effect their mood and or their demeanor. Does the stress level your partner feels mirror into your relationship? Well simply put their is no way to avoid the stress of your significant other, you are the person that will get the brunt of it. Hopefully you understand this even though it is tough to stomach at times.

When people are stressed they tend to dwell on the object or situation that causes them the stress. As their partner anything that you can do to help them avoid thinking out this item the better. There are several web sites out there with suggestions on how to combat stress and I would suggest you reading up on it. If you are the partner that seems to handle stress better then you might be able to help them out by diverting their attention away from the stress. Things such as taking walks, getting outside on beautiful days are great ideas. Find some activities to enjoy and make sure they participate. Starting an exercise program is not only beneficial in the reduction of stress but it is also great for your health. Looking at what you eat can also help in the battle with stress. Massages are a wonderful way to help the person you love cope with their issues. Sex is another great option as it brings you closer and burns stress away quickly. Many people say that they get to stressed for sex and yet sex is a great way to let go of stress, so fight through that initial urge to pass and realize that it might just be the best way for your partner to help you battle the stress monster.

Making the stress disappear completely is most likely not an option in most cases. We can only do so much and usually the stress isn't something you can just defuse quickly. Helping them cope with the problems and getting it out of their minds is the next best thing you can do if you love them. Help them breath in the fresh air, and see that all this will pass.

Click on the title of this post to view a list of stress reducers.

Wake Up on the Right Side of the Bed

Do you ever have those mornings when nothing seems to go right and everyone seems to get on your nerves. To make matters worse you want to take everything out on your partner. Well, when you get up and feel this way you need to take action. Try this.

When you start wondering why am are so snippy with everyone go back into your bedroom and lay back down on the bed.  Take a couple of deep breaths and release them slowly.  Then get up on the opposite side of the bed.  Make a conscious effort to relax and start your day over.

Stress begets more stress so take some deep breaths and let your "new" morning start out better.

Too stressed for sex? You are only hurting yourself.

Stress can effect several things in your relationship. One of them being your sex life. However letting stress dampen you sex life actually is a double edged sword. Sex is considered a stress reliever so what better way to relieve stress then to have sex. Sex releases happy chemicals into your body that helps you relax as well as welcome sleep, this in turn helps your body become stronger. All of these things help you combat stress. Several professionals suggest taking steps to get yourself in the mood. If you click on the title of this post you will go to a list of some things that help your libido.

Bypassing sex because of stress is a no win situation. On the other hand putting a little effort into your sex life can help reduce this stress greatly. You and your partner will both benefit from the effort you put into your sex life. Now quite making excuses and start working toward getting rid of that stress by having some great sex. You relationship will thank you.

Snack Well

Part of being a couple is taking care of each other. We look out for our partner because we want them to be around as long as possible. Well one thing you can do to help them out is for both of you to Snack Well, together. It is so much easier when the both of you watch how you snack.

Start this out by going to the store together. Choose snacks that are healthy and skip the aisle that would tempt you. Choose alternative to some of your favorite items such as ice cream, candy, and chips. If you look closely you can find replacements that are similar with less fat and more nutrition in them. The simple fact of the matter is if you don't have it in your house you won't eat it. Late night cravings will be put to rest if you don't have the tub of ice cream in the freeze. If you must have that frozen delight choose sherbet or frozen yogurt instead. Be supportive of each other and remind each other how much healthier you will be by eating things like carrots, bananas, and apples.

Thing about it this way. Eating better will increase you livelihood. You will feel better and have more energy to do things. Eating well also helps with stress and improving your body image. People who eat well have better sex and more frequently enjoy intimacy. So eating healthy will improve your energy, self esteem, over all health, mental attitude, and your sex life. Why are we all not eating better?

Clicking on the title of this post will take you to a website dedicated to showing you healthy snack options.

Photo courtesy of programwitch from flickr creative commons.

Stress got you down ..Get out some old pictures.

Is your partner stressed? Are they having a terrible day at work or traffic got them ready to strangle someone. We all feel like this from time to time. When you or your partner are feeling the weight for stress I suggest getting out some of your old photos. Get the ones of the two of you on vacation or on your honeymoon. They can be pictures of your children romping through the woods, or holiday gatherings. The only stipulation is that the events in the pictures were relatively stress free. Remember the time you spend together when you were dating, and the only thing that meant anything was the two of you. Do you have pictures of that time in your life well bring them out if you do. Remember the funny time when your cares where not even present and bring out pictures of that. You might have to do a little digging in the basement or attic but you know that those images are there.

Help your partner recover from their stress. Take them back to a place ,with the use of old photos, that will sooth their inner beast.

We cannot relive the past but we can remember it!

The Hook Up (We like to call it Lunch)

The work days can seem long and tiring. I suggest, if possible, that you take time out of your work day to have lunch with each other as often as possible. I understand sometimes it is just impossible as work schedules might not match up or the logistics might be to far out of the way. If that is the case make sure to find days when you or your partner are off work and plan out a lunch for the two of you. You don't have to go to an expensive restaurant. You can even through a picnic together to eat in the park, nearest to your workplace. The point is the little extra effort helps show your partner that you would love to be spending more time with them, and that you will take a little bit here and a little bit there. Always be understanding if you call your partner up to surprise them by meeting them for lunch, because they might not be able to attend lunch with you on that day. Never make your partner feel bad because they were unaware you were wanting to spend lunch together. If this happens make arrangements for dinner, when you get home. Always have a back up lunch planned. Sometimes lunches need to be cut short so don't expect your partner to be able to spend an hour at lunch at the spur of the moment. When you finally get to lunch make sure to spend the time with each other not on your cell phone or complaining about the plumber, that only leads to stress. Put your phone on silent, and talk about your interests or how their work day is going. If you find yourself wondering what to say, bring a few old photos of your past vacations and remember those days over your lunch.

I understand the purpose for lunch is to eat but it can also be an enjoyable time to spend with your significant other.