Consider your time together when looking for a new job.

One thing that slips peoples minds when they are looking for a new job is the time lost for their relationship. You relationship needs to be considered during this process as much as anything else. I have seen countless amounts of people work opposite shifts to avoid child care costs. This is great for your finances but very bad for your relationship. Sometimes I understand it is unavoidable when you are just starting a new position. Look at the way your new position will effect your relationship before saying, yes to it. Will it put stress on your relationship? Will it allow you time to have together? When will you sleep compared to your partner? These are all valid questions that need to be addressed before you take a position. Can your relationship handle it if you new position calls for you to be gone a good portion of the week? There are countless questions that can arise. Money is an obvious concern for people in this economy, however a broken relationship might cost you more then you stand to make. Weigh all your options before deciding were to apply for jobs and start with the ones that mean the most to you. I am hoping that is the love you share with that special someone.

Don't be left behind as your partner grows.

Relationships are not cut in stone they are like trees blowing in the wind. They have to sway and chance with the directions the winds are moving. This is the reason why you need to be aware of chances in your partner. Maybe you don't understand the transition that they are making in their life but totally ignoring it will soon find you and them both wondering who the other one is. This such as new hobbies, schooling, or jobs are things that can effect a person and change them. For example if when you started dating your partner was a factory worker and then got a job as a insurance salesman they are going to chance. They will dress different they will act different. Same goes for education it can drastically change a person and if you are not prepared to learn and change with them then you might soon find each other with nothing to talk about. With nothing to talk about your relationship will soon start to wither. Even if you are comfortable with yourself you need to branch out as your partner does and never take lightly what they are getting into. When this happens your relationship will change and if you are not flexible then your relationship will break. Be ready to sway in the wind as your partner changes and enjoy the differences and dedicate yourself to learning not necessarily what they are learning but why they are growing. Grow with them not against them.

Lust in a relationship

Once you have an established relationship can there still be lust for each other. You bet there can be. The definition of lust is a intense sexual desire or appetite. Now who wouldn't want that in their relationship. We seem to think of lust as something we have at the beginning phases of a relationship or when we can't have the person we want. Yet lust can make our long term relationships so much better if we just look at the definition. I can't understand why people want their relationship to take on different meaning once it is established. It's like so many people want a roommate or the financial help that relationships bring but they don't wan the basis of what relationships are about. Companionship, love, passion, romance, sex, and lust should never wain in your relationship. If they start to it is your responsibility to direct your attention back to them. I think the big thing is we have to get out of the mold that relationships have to get boring with time! If you look at some truly loving couples that have been together for a long period of time you will find that they put all these things to the front of their relationship. Because as I always say if you put them at the end of your relationship that is where you will soon be "At the end of your relationship"

Wine Glasses.

Something every couple should have is a good set of wine glasses. You don't have to have a whole bar full and they don't have to be the most expensive glasses. When the two of you get a chance to sit down and share a bottle of wine you don't want to be putting it into the last glasses the McDonald's sold. Nor do you want to pour wine into two totally different glasses that makes you feel like they are are the only ones you can find. There is some symbolic meaning in the fact that the two of you share the exact same glass for the purpose of the drink. This is that it shows you are equals and share in the responsibility of building your relationship. It shows that you are equals and that your love flows from one another like the wine flows across your lips. I don't care if you purchase the cheapest wine in the store you need to make sure you have matching glasses for your toast of love. Once you pour the wine and wait for each other to sip of it's delight you will understand what I am saying.

Gratitude.

Sometimes we get caught up with the feeling of lack or what we don't have in our lives. We forget about all the wonderful things that we just expect to be there day in and day out. Instead of enjoying the things we have we continue to struggle for the things we don't have. We build stress and depression going after these thing. All the time the things that we need to make us happy are right in front of our face. If you haven't read or watched The Secret yet, when you do they take in large part about gratitude and how being thankful is a big part of getting what you want out of life. Give and take is a force in the universe that smiles on you when you understand it so start today and be thankful and appreciative for the good things around you. Then see how the rest of the things start to fall into place.

Are you leaving yourself to many exits to avoid intimacy?

Exits are basically ways to escape or leave things. Are you using any exits to avoid intimacy in your relationship? Think about it do you avoid intimacy in your relationship and if so what is your choice of exits. Things such as television, or sickness are two of the common ones. We have all heard the old line "Not tonight dear, I have a headache" or we get so involved in a show that we have to watch it several times a night until we are to tired. Sports are another big exit people use to get away from intimacy in a relationship. Personally I don't understand why you would want to be in a relationship and avoid intimacy. Exits can be things that are important also like you kids, do you know anyone that puts their children ahead of everything else and then doesn't have time to enjoy things they want to do. I agree that your children are important but they need to understand that relationships are important and you are the only one that can show them that. Some exits are harmful to the person or other persons in a relationship. Alcohol and drugs are the main exits people use to escape from the pressure of being in a relationship. Right now I want you to think about exits you use in your relationship, they can be things you use to avoid intimacy or even just things you use to avoid areas of your relationship such as parenting or friendship. Relationship are not easy for everyone and the are constantly requiring work, so instead of shying away with the use of exits why not buck up and put the effort into building a strong relationship?

Don't be so quick to react.

One thing that I feel is very important when dealing with troubles in a relationship is to react to quickly. When we first hear the sound of bad news we are usually quick react usually in a negative way. However take some time get a few deep breaths and think before you say anything. Money issues and job losses are part of life and if you jump all over your partner before you hear their story you might be jumping to conclusions. How do you think your partner would feel if you jumped them for losing their job only to find out later that they wouldn't give in to doing something illegal for their boss. Look at every situation from every angle before you jump in to offer you opinion. This will keep your relationship in tip top shape. Mistakes happen and they shouldn't come between two people that love each other.

Plans Change!! Unfortunately

Have you ever got together as a couple and set up some great plans set in motion. Maybe you are going to have a great escapade or meet for a romantic dinner. Maybe you are just going to get busy and don't want to be interrupted. Then something happens. That throws you plans into a tizzy. It is usually something that can't be avoided. Like a sick child or parent that needs help or it could even be a work related event. None the less it makes you plans change. You know it can't be helped so why do we feel so disgusted or angry.

We take care of the situation but we never seem to get back to the plans. The evening has been thrown off and their is no getting it back. We are glad we managed to help whoever needed the help but man are we upset it happened.

Welcome to being part of a couple. This is a sign of how strong your relationship is. People with a strong relationship understand their partner has to take care of these things. I suggest when this happens both of you call for a rain check. Don't think of it as missing your opportunity just think of it as a postponement. Nothing in life ever works out perfect so we shouldn't expect it to in our relationships either.

So quite pouting and either set your event up for another day or change it a little so you can still enjoy the evening. If you partner gets called into work on a night you were going to have a romantic dinner out make an adjustment. Find out when he/she is coming home have a pizza and candles burning on the table. If you have a sexy evening planned and one of your kids gets sick as your partner cares for the child write them a sexy note explaining what you are going to do to them tomorrow. In a relationship you have to go with the flow and the flow doesn't always go the way you want it to. Lastly never get upset with your partner when these situations arise, instead thing about how great they are for doing what they are doing for other. Isn't that part of the reason you care about them?