Consider your time together when looking for a new job.

One thing that slips peoples minds when they are looking for a new job is the time lost for their relationship. You relationship needs to be considered during this process as much as anything else. I have seen countless amounts of people work opposite shifts to avoid child care costs. This is great for your finances but very bad for your relationship. Sometimes I understand it is unavoidable when you are just starting a new position. Look at the way your new position will effect your relationship before saying, yes to it. Will it put stress on your relationship? Will it allow you time to have together? When will you sleep compared to your partner? These are all valid questions that need to be addressed before you take a position. Can your relationship handle it if you new position calls for you to be gone a good portion of the week? There are countless questions that can arise. Money is an obvious concern for people in this economy, however a broken relationship might cost you more then you stand to make. Weigh all your options before deciding were to apply for jobs and start with the ones that mean the most to you. I am hoping that is the love you share with that special someone.

Money in your Relationship

One thing that can bring a fight on is the topic of money. Usually one person takes control of the finances in a realtionship and the other partner has no clue as to where they stand. This is very dangerous for both partners. You should always have an idea and discuss your finanaces with each other no matter which person you are. Both partners should have access to some amount of money they can spend on their personal likes. Don't call it an allowance just say it is your portion of the household income to spend. Even if the person can't manage money worth a hoot they still need to be in control of some of it. If one of you is very bad a managing money I suggest setting up a special account for the person to use as their spending money. This way your basic budget stays in tact and you don't have to worry about little surprises throughing off the household income. If you want your relationship to stay healthy you need to discuss most of your purchases, going to the store and paying the bills need not be discussed unless you are deciding which ones you can't pay this month. If a partner does something outside the norm to make some money, make sure they get their fair share of the amount. Bottom line is your well bing comes first but everyone need to just blow some money from time to time. Work together on your budget and it will be easier for both of your to stick to. Last thing if you do get in trouble financially don't be afraid to ask for help right now banks and companies are tring as hard as they can to keep the economy from a total break down.

Checkbook

One of the most common fights couples have is about money. There never seems to be enough money when you are trying to budget for two or a whole household. Yes we have to set boundaries and budgets yet we also have to have a little freedom. My feelings are that you need to have one checkbook that takes care of your household bills, car payments, insurance, etc. That way the both of you can oversee the finances. This checkbook should stay at the house never to leave. If you need to use it for groceries, or outside purposes, get a debit card. Neither partner should carry this checkbook around with them. That is set in stone, both of you know exactly where that checkbook is at all times. You can designate one or both of you to pay the bills as they come in.

Now here is where I side track from most people. I think that both partners should also have either their own checking account or at least a preloaded debit card. Why? you might ask. Because we all have things we would like to purchase that we don't want to have to ask the other partner if it is okay. Set a predetermined amount to deposit in these accounts each pay period and then hands off the others account. This will allow them to save for things they might want to purchase or to buy you presents for anniversaries, birthdays, or other holidays. We use to keep all our money in one pot and it made if very difficult to purchase an anniversary present for my wife. Either I would ask her for a certain amount of money and then I had to answer 20 questions as to why I needed it. If I didn't get approval first the checkbook would show the deed anyway. Then I would be answering questions like "Why did you write a check to Victoria's Secret the other day" Thus my surprises where always blown.

If you decide to do this you cannot judge the other person on what they buy with their budgeted amount. For instance if you partner saves their money and purchases a $250 ipod. You cannot say "We could have used that money to buy this or that" They have made the effort and sacrificed other things to get this item. Make an effort to understand their purchase, usually most people have a reason to buy something. This technique also helps out if one of you is a classic over spender. Now they are limited to only the amount in their checking account, while the other remains off limits to both partners.

Relationships are tough enough but throw in money problems and they become even tougher. This ours, mine and yours technique gives everyone a little variance and a chance to purchase things without getting approval from the relationship committee. Lastly just to add don't make these individual accounts with credit cards that can be a nightmare only use accounts where you deposit money and that is all you can withdraw.

Click on the title line of this post and go to Oprah's website that gives you more information on finances for couples.