Getting through tough days in your relationship.

Every relationship has days that you seem like you are unappreciated or that you don't get exactly what you want. This is normal and everyone feels that way from time to time. This is the time that you need to count your blessings. Yes, I mean literally counting your blessings. Sit down and thing about the things that your partner does that are important to you, or that just make you feel good. You quickly start to balance out those negative thoughts you are having with positive ones. Soon the scale will be tipped in the favor of the positive thoughts as your mind starting thinking of the more detailed things. Things like making you dinner, or doing the laundry, or that time he/she made passionate love to you last week. This is how you keep those negative thoughts in check. Once you start to compare them to the wonderful things you partner does you will quickly put your uneasiness to rest.

Let you partner know you are talking good about them.

You won't believe what my husband did....

We all are curious about how are partner talks about us when they are not around us. We wonder to they bash us and only tell their friends about the not so good things we do. Could be possible that they are speaking like we are a saint? There is no way to tell for sure unless you overhear a conversation and hard as it is that is eavesdropping and isn't right. This is where we can tell our partner when we talk good about them. Let them know that you told your girlfriends how romantic they are or when you tell the guys how you have the best partner in the world. Tell them specifics like, "The other day the girls went nuts when I showed them the note you left me when you went on your trip" or "All the guys are so jealous of me because I told them about you sitting up that special trip to the ballpark for me" We so often have an vision of your partner belittling us because that is what we see on television. Another good reason to pitch the television. The programs and talk shows are full of people talking about the terrible things their lovers do. Maybe we should start a show called "How great my lover is" that lets people talk about the good in their relationship. No fights just proud partners expressing how wonderful their partner is. Now I might watch that show to pick up some extra wonderful things to do. Go a step farther and ask you friends when they are bashing their mate, "Does you partner do anything that pleases you?" Get them searching their mind for positive things and you might just chance a persons whole day.

Who brought the negative energy in here?

The most wonderful place to feel safe and important is inside your relationship. You should feel protected and special within the realm of your our partners arms. Yet sometimes we bring negative energy into our relationship that can cause turmoil and struggles. Problems at work, struggles with our children, or just a tough drive home can cause us to dump our negative energy into our relationship. Once we do this then that negative energy starts gnawing on our passionate loving relationship. Think back have you ever let a bad day or bad situation outside your home effect your relationship. Have you ever been testy with your partner because you had one of these bad days? Is it fair that your partner should get the brunt of your feelings about that subject. While you should be able to air out your problems with your partner you should also drop it and and thankful to them for being their afterwards. Always remember that the love you have for each other is the best medicine for a stressful situation. Next time you come home with this feeling of negative energy try this. Wipe it off your feet on your door mat before you get in the house, make a conscience effort to not struggle with it during your time with the people you love the most. If you really feel you need to address the problem with your partner then ask them to step out side to discuss it. Them wipe it off your feet before you come in again. It is easy to dump all our baggage into our relationship because it is close to us and our major focus. However using your relationship as a dump for all the negative energy will soon find you wondering why your relationship is so negative.

Take inventory of your relationship.

If your like the normal couple you only talk about your partners faults instead of focusing on the good things that they do in your relationship. We dwell on the facts of what they didn't do instead of celebrating the things that they do to help out the household or your relationship. What you need to do is to take time and make a list of all the good things your partner does in your relationship. Write down all the little things like taking out the garbage, picking up the kids, or even fixing dinner. Then look for major things they do to make your relationship better, like making sure the two of you have a date night, or planning a great weekend getaway for the two of you. I am sure once you start writing down things you will be amazed at how many good things your partner does. Do they make the bed, mow the lawn, let you watch the shows you want, or even just kiss you good night. Then the next time you want to yell at them for leaving the lid off the toothpaste, pull out your list and read one of the good things they do. Maybe you can live without the lid on the toothpaste.

Making Relationships Strong

I know you have probably heard every trick to making your relationship strong and solid. I am here to tell you the best way is to have a great sex life together. Research shows that couples that have a great sex life have a stronger and more profound life in general together. They are generally more healthy and able to do more things together. Most of them also list their partner as their best friend. People in general who have a great sex life are more confident, and efficient.

I hear so often how people are consumed by trying to have a better sex life that other parts of their life fall apart. So if you take the sex equation out of their problem list it frees up a lot more time to concentrate on other things. Plus why would anyone want to deprive their partner from feeling great. If you care about your partner at all then you should want to enjoy sex with them. Now problems do arise and I understand that but there are many different types of sex that can be enjoyed so I don't buy that excuse list.

So if you want your relationship to hit the pinnacle you need to make your sex life a priority. Not just for one of you for both of you. This goes both ways. Try it for three to six months and see watch and see how much it improves your relationship. I am sure you will find out it has positive results. You have to make the commitment your relationship needs it.