Mood Music

We can tell a lot about the way our partner is feeling by the type of music they are listening to. It takes a little study but you will start to learn how they react to certain types of music. Is the music up tempo or slow and methodical? Is what they are listening to making them get up and dance or are they just sitting listening to the words of the song. Maybe they are listening to the blues because they are sad or down in the dumps, or they could just like the blues. You need to start cataloging what type of music they are listening to and their emotions. For instance if every time they are listening to some funky disco music they seem to be dancing around having a good time, then make a note of it. However if they are sitting listening to some country song, drinking beer and in a down in the dumps mood, make a note of it. Go as far as to write down specific songs and seem to get them pumped up or feeling good. Then the next time they are having a bad day, slip on one of those songs that made them feel good at a different time and see if it improves their mood. This is one of those simple little things you do for the person you love, get to know them and how the music effects them. They may not make the connection but you will know the real reason you put that song on for them is because you love them.

Listen.

One of the hardest skill to master in a relationship is the art of listening. We all want to add our two cents worth and can't wait to bust into the conversation to do so. Sometimes however we just need to listen and not offer any advice or insight to the situation. Sometimes people just need to vent out frustrations and the person they want to do this with is you. It is hard as the person that just listens to not want to help out, but this only makes matters worse. The person venting just needs to get their feelings out in the open and when they do the release comes. Usually if they have a point that is not a valid one they will see the errors of their way as they vent. They might come across as yelling at you but they are not, they just want to pretend they are letting the person or situation that upset them have it. The yelling or raising of their voice is just a natural defense and another means of letting the stress out. The best thing you can do is hold all comments to the end, after they have told or screamed the whole situation and then run down scenarios with them as you try to find solutions or comfort.