Learn about your partners past if they will let you.

Most of us have events in our life that have shaped who we are and the reactions we have to things. Do you know those important things about your partner? Do you know why the won't touch alcohol or why they shy away from touch sometimes. Do you understand that sometimes they need a little extra to compensate for something that they missed as a child? These are things that don't just get expressed on your first few dates. These are deep dark secrets that take comfort and love to let someone else know. You are given a wonderful gift when they share these things with you and yet sometimes we don't know quite how to handle them. First and for most keep their confidence in you and don't go trying to fix it tomorrow. This baggage has formed over years and isn't about to go away with one little conversation about it. Don't get discouraged either know that when something is hidden away for long periods of time it forms it's own defense and won't be easily broken down. Things like sexual abuse, alcohol problems, emotional abuse are all things that can affect your relationship but are not going to be easily put to rest. Listening is your best friend, don't judge or offer answers right away let the person get it off their chest and mind. Be their friend and don't get defensive of them ask questions like "How did that make you feel?", or "How did you handle that?" be his/her rock at this point. Don't try to out do him/her even if you have had something happen in your opinion that was much worse. Focus on the pain that your partner is feeling at this point of them opening up. If the problem becomes a burden and starts affecting your relationship then maybe you might suggestion counseling. The point is they need your help but you cannot possibly know how they are feeling because you didn't live it. People will react differently to the same instance so their is no quick fix here. The best thing you can do is be supportive and give all your love to them. Picking up the pieces is hard work and trying to put the puzzle back together is even harder.

Are you a Psychic? Sometimes your relationship will call for you to be one.

Have you ever had one of those days when you know something is not quite right with your partner. Maybe they are down in the dumps or just kinda shying away from everything. This is when you need to become a psychic. Most likely they are not going to come out and say what is bothering them, although that would make it much easier. Now is when you need to feel what they need. Do the need to be alone, do they need affection, could they use a good roll in the hay, everyone is different and in the situation might call for a different tactic. Last time they were in this state they might have wanted to be left alone, yet this time they might need a shoulder to cry on. The last thing you want to do is to ignore the situation. Acting like nothing is wrong is a sure way to say that you don't care. Even if they want to be alone the fact that you noticed they were upset is a good feeling. You will never be able to always do the right thing but you have to make the attempt. The better you know your partner the more psychic you will become and better able to call out which type of mood they are in.

Speaking Kind words will be out soon for all to enjoy

Our first book "Speaking Kind Words" will be out in March sometime. We are very excited and hope that all our fans will pick up a copy. The books focus is on ways you can improve your relationship with way you say things to each other. Turning things that would be considered complaining into a way that helps build your relationship instead of tearing it apart. If you have anything nice that you say to your partner to build them up we would love to hear it so drop your suggestions to us at thecouplesspot@gmail.com We would love to hear your ideas and might even use them in the book giving you credit of coarse. Understand that anything you send us is viewed by us as permission for us to use your idea in the book. Thanks and keep improving your relationship each and every day.