Get ready for your big kiss tonight

          Tonight is the night where you can make a kiss last a whole year.  The ever popular New Years kiss is about to happen.  As we celebrate our past year and the new one coming up we use this kiss as a ceremony to ring in our New Year.  Make sure you are ready for this big even tonight use chapstick throughout the day and practice your pucker to make your kiss the best one of the year.  My feeling is you should start kissing before midnight and then keep kissing until the New Year comes in.  Making this kiss transcend time by covering two years.  Great Idea, huh.

Give a signal

          Trying to tell each other what feels good during sex seems to be a trouble for a lot of couples.  Something about giving orders or criticism during the event seems wrong to some people.  Yet we all want to feel good and have our needs met.  My solution to this problem is to set up some signals so that you can communicate to your lover while not having to verbalize your feelings.  The next time the two of you have a conversation about sex set us these signals to tell each other how you are doing.  Tell them if you tug on their hair that means you like what they are doing or that if you tap their shoulder you would like them to do something else.  These signals are totally up to you and you can have as many as you want.  Have one for when you are ready to try a new position or when you want some oral stimulation.  This way you don't have to say, "Oh that doesn't feel good" or "Oh MY GOD don't stop that"  unless you are comfortable saying those things.  

Making love needs some light!

          I am betting that most of the sex in the world today takes place in the dark.  What a shame this is.  I understand that some people have issues with body image and that being in the dark helps to hide in that manner.  Now I am not talking turning on all the bright florescent lights like that in a hospital.  I am talking about getting some candles or better yet get some of the new flame less candles for safety.  The reason why I like a little light is because it adds something to love making.  You can now looking lovingly into your partners eyes or get turned on more by her naked breast or his rear end.  You can see as your partner makes you feel good and watch them kiss and tantalize you.  This can bring a thrill to your sex life like you have never had.  Think of the image of your lover flickering in candle light as they move in to kiss you, how sexy is that.  

Back to work for most of us.

          Well most of us are back to work today if you weren't yesterday.  It seems like that time around Christmas passes so fast.  My theory on that is that it is because you are having a really wonderful time with the people you love.  So instead of wishing that time would slow down make sure you enjoy all of that time and realize that it is because you are in love that it passes so quickly.  Hold on to the memories and realize that when you are living life it is moving fast only when you stop loving does that time seem to slow down.  Enjoy the fact you are in love so many people out there are looking for that feeling and you my friend have it so revel in it.  

Special New Years Eve Plans.

          If you haven't made New Years Eve plans by now you are most likely out of luck.  If that is the case, or maybe you just don't have enough money to go out to a fancy New Years Eve party it is time to create your own.  Ask you friends what they are doing and if they are interested in having a New Years Eve get together.  You can find board games to play or have special movies available to watch together.  Maybe just some great deep conversation would do.  Obviously the point would be to ring in the New Year with other couples.  If that doesn't work or if the two of you want a little along time on New Years Eve plan a little romantic night around the changing of the year.  Go to dinner or make a special meal, get videos or games the two of you enjoy playing, talk about your future and where you want to be next year.  Write all the great ideas down you have about your future and then the next new years see how close you are to those dreams.  The important part is for the two of you to be together as the New Year comes in, get that first kiss in and renew your love.

Take it down together.

          We always seem to have a special time while putting up the Christmas tree or decorations for the holidays.  Yet when it comes time to take them down we seem to be in the mind set of just getting them down and put away as fast as we can.  Why don't the two of you make a special time of putting away the decorations.  Spend the day together gently packing and remembering the special ornaments and decorations that you have.   Play the last little bit of Christmas music for the year, maybe get a bottle of wine to share if your staying home and enjoy each other as you put all the things away for the year.   Spend the whole day doing it if you like and take your time to make it special and so that all your memories are ready for the next Christmas.  Heck you might even put a note in the box with the decorations on your feelings during this season to read when you get them out next year.  

Merry Christmas to all!

Merry Christmas out there to all the readers of The Couples Spot hope your holiday is fantastic and the love you feel lasts forever.  Take time for the two of you and make all your holiday dreams come true.

Love to the World!

Special Present

          Christmas is here and it is time to share with your family and friends.  Yet as a couple you need to find a special moment or two to spend just sharing the holiday between the two of you.  Maybe you have to meet in the closet for a special Christmas kiss during your crazy family gathering.  Saving a special present to give during alone time is another way to share a special moment between the two of you.  Try to pick out he most memorable present you have to give at this time.  If you get any jewelry this would be a good time to give it or if you have anything sexy this would also be a good time to give it.  While the holidays are suppose to be about family and people you care about it is okay to give your relationship some special attention.  Not only does it make your relationship stronger it help make all your holiday spirit more special.  

Romantic Drive looking for lights

          Want a fun and romantic thing to do this holiday?  Just hop in the car and start searching for wonderful houses decorated for the holiday season.  Many have special things set in their yard while others will have amazing lights lighting up their property.  It can be a very romantic time just searching around together looking for these holiday treasures.  If you have kids it can make it even more fun as you enlist their help searching as a family almost like following the star that lead the wise men to jesus if that is your belief.  Sometimes you can see the glow from far away and sometimes you will just happen upon them.  Make sure to make note of the ones that are you favorite as they most likely decorate every year.   This way you can plan out a route the next holiday season.  

Christmas eve is when the naughty people get their presents.

          Christmas is a warm and wonderful time of sharing and caring.  People are excited and filled with joy as the are thinking about others.  This is especially true in a relationship as you search for things for your partner to show you love.  What happens if you and your partner want to get a little naughty around this time of year.  Do you want to buy them something sexy this year or maybe something the two of you can enjoy together.  Well you can't have them unwrap a sex toy with the kids Christmas morning.  That is why Christmas eve is the time for the naughty presents.  Take some time once the kids are tucked away and the family is gone and find that special naughty present and share it with your partner as while no creatures will be stirring.  The peace in the house on Christmas eve is a perfect time to share something intimate.  Be it a present or just some special intimate time this is the perfect opportunity.  Making love to each other on Christmas eve is the best present to start off with.  You know the morning with be filled with a different excitement but tonight take time for your relationship and get a little naughty.  Santa won't mind!

Time to hang the Mistletoe

One of my favorite traditions is that you have to kiss your lover under Mistletoe.  You can use this to your advantage by strategically placing Mistletoe around your house.   Think of places you would love to be kissed or would love to kiss your partner and then set to work to place your mistletoe.  Put some over the top of the shower, how about over the kitchen sink so you can kiss them as they are doing the dishes, or what about placing it over your bed and surprising them with amazing passionate kisses before you explain and point to the mistletoe above.  Heck you could even rap some up and give it to them as a present for them to place somewhere.  As always be creative and think of how and where you would love to be kissed then make sure not to break tradition and kiss through out the holidays.  

Just Touch Each Other

          You know when you are sitting watching a movie or sitting beside each other reading.  Why not touch each other?  Put your hand on your partner's leg or caress his/her arm a little.  It can be an intimate touch without being sexual.  Let him/her know that even though you are enjoying the movie or book that you are glad to be doing it together.  Letting your partner know you are present and not so absorbed in what you are watching or reading that you are forgetting he/she is with you.  Touch means so much and we don't do enough of it in most relationships.  Don't be afraid to hold hands, put your arms around each other, or stay in a hug a little longer.  These simple touches say "I Love You" and they let your partner feel you love him/her.  

Be Grateful of what you have today.

Today's post is quite simple.  I want you to look around and be grateful for all you have in your relationship.  Do you get to snuggle with your partner, do they let you sleep in, did your partner take out the trash, or did he/she make supper last night so you could do other things these are all examples of several thousands of things I am sure you can think of once you start looking.  Being grateful for what you have is the way to be content and happy with your relationship.  If you are constantly looking for the negative in your relationship that is how your relationship will be negative.  So, start looking for the things you are grateful for today and let your partner know they are special to you.  It is amazing how much better it will make your life.  

Smell up the house this holiday season.

          We have mentioned before the way scents can help and improve your relationship.  They can also spice up the times around the holidays.  Cinnamon spiced apple cider, pine trees, or christmas cookies are wonderful  smells that can create warmth and enjoyment in your house this holiday season.  What smells does your partner remember from his/her holidays past.  Maybe it is the smell of gingerbread or turkey cooking, it could even be the smell of  egg nog.  What ever scent makes your partner think of the holidays try to match that smell and surprise them when they come home.  

Give gifts that spark romance!

          Gifts can be wonderful tool on building your relationship.  You can give sentimental gifts that really touch someone heart.  However those are tough to find.  Instead of searching for the one that will touch his/her heart strings why not give the gift that will create lasting nights of romance.  Candles for candle lit dinners, Warm flannel sheets for snuggling up in, or a trip to take after Christmas has past, can make lasting memories even after Christmas is over.  When you really think about it, it is not that hard to get into the groove on this.  A romantic love seat for watching movies in, a bottle of wine to share, or even tickets to a show the list can go on and on.  You just have to think about what your partner would consider romantic and get something that would lead into that romantic evening.  Being a great gift giver doesn't have to be a struggle and when you are in love it gets easier and easier.  

To stay healthy this winter - Drink your juice, take your vitamins and have sex!

          We all hear about the wonderful ways to stay healthy during the winter months.  Things like drink your juice, and take your vitamins have long been standards to avoid the ills that come with the winter months.  We spend an insane amount of money on precautions to avoid getting these illnesses.  Yet they still seem to come.  I am not knocking the powers of juice or vitamins but I think you are missing a key ingredient to this mixture.  The ingredient is sex!  Yes you heard me sex is an magical drug that is free and very powerful in not only helping fight off illness but in overall health, too. Many studies have found that people that have a wonderful sex life life longer and feel better.  Not only does your body release your feel good hormones during sex but it does so much more.  Your mental state will be much better and you will think more positive.  Sex in a committed relationship is always a win win situation as long as both partners are in agreement and open to the passion.

Don't let the holidays be a time to forget about health.

          The holiday are packed with wonderful treats to eat.  Cookies and candies that everyone want you to enjoy with them.  Here is where the two of you make a stand and figure out how you can enjoy the holidays without the sugar fest that it usually is.  Try to find some great snacks you can make without giving into the cookie trap.  Think veggies or fruit for your holiday cheer.  Set out cut up fruit and veggies and have lot of nuts laying around for consumption.  Look for wonderful alternatives like pumpkin pies or breads that are healthier.  I am not saying you can't have a cookie now and then but balance it out and don't eat as many as Santa is going to eat this holiday season.  

Intimacy is the best Christmas present for you partner.

You can find a lot of gifts to give your partner, but why not use your passion and create a Christmas intimate evening for them.  Find a night where the two of you can be along then give them the Christmas present they will be thinking about until next Christmas.   Find something sexy to wear be it a cute little Santa outfit or some candy cane boxer shorts.  Create some Christmas lighting in your special room with blinking colorful lights.  Get a wonderful Christmas drink and snacks and let your partner know how much you care about them.  Make love under the Christmas tree, place mistletoe around their body where you want to kiss, or just wrap yourself up.  Make it a memorable night by giving them the gift of a sex toy or performing a sexual act that you have never or seldom do.  Get prepared however this just might become a tradition and you will have your partner counting down the days until Christmas.

Christmas List

           You might think that making a Christmas list is for children.  However making a Christmas list for your partner might just help them find the perfect gift for you.  Your list can include things you would like to have that might no buy for yourself.  When you are writing your list don't just put on it material things.  You can include things on your list that don't cost a thing.  Things like a kiss, or a massage, you could even ask for a romantic Christmas eve dinner with wine and candles.   This is a great idea if you don't have much money for presents.  Giving feelings of love and special favors is just the perfect gift.  Make up little coupons for things like kisses or back massages and wrap them up.  You still get the excitement of Christmas and your partner will love his/her gifts.  This way you don't have to wait in line to return them.  

Don't let lack destroy your relationship.

          Lack of anything is not good.  For example lack of food leads to hunger, lack of exercise leads to being fat, and lack of love leads to feeling lonely.  We need to take a good hard look at what our relationship is lacking.  Is affection missing? then you need to find a way to get more affection in your relationship.  Is trust missing?  Then trust is what you need to make your relationship special.  Is passion missing?  Them the two of you need to find a way to make passion a part of your relationship.  What happens is that when you lack something in your relationship you will seek it out somewhere else.  That is why I feel there are so many relationship doomed.  Instead of searching for a way to find it within our relationship with communication and working together, we look else where when you are not getting what we need.  So today take a good hard look at your relationship and find what is missing.  Go to your partner and express you feelings, ask for their help, ask for what they feel it lacking and work together to build a wonderful combination of a relationship.  You have to give and take to balance your relationship, don't be the one that upsets this balance.  

The best gift you can give your partner is your time.

          Have you ever found yourself at the end of the day with no energy or time left for your relationship.  You worked all day or ran the kids around to practices, school, and all other activities.  Maybe you have done housework all day and it gets to the end of the night the kids are in bed and you just want to go to sleep yourself and get rested for the same thing tomorrow.   This is so common for many couples as the struggle to find time to fit their relationship into the mix.  I bet however if you really look at what you do during the day you will find time bandits that could spare you a lot of time.   Start looking around and save time for your partner and your relationship this way.  Do you watch television or play online games during the day?  Then cut them out and save that time for your partner, do you run multiple times around town?  Maybe you could combine your trips to save time.   How about even saving time with the housework by giving the kids incentive to help out by giving them special favors at a later time.  If you relationship is important it is worth finding ways to make time for it.  A dinner out can take as little as an hour, a hour snuggling can be more relaxing then making sure the house is straight and being intimate can help you find a deeper sleep and recharge you batteries not only for your relationship but for the next days hustle and bustle.  Use your time for your relationship as a reward and you will find the time you need.  

Effort is what a relationship takes.

          Effort is the main ingredient to making a relationship work.  All the other things are lost without the effort behind them.  Think about it how much better does anything turn out when you put a little more effort into it. Why should your relationship be any different.  So do your partner and you a favor today and put a little extra effort into your relationship.  You will both be glad you did.  

Stressed? It is a good time to focus on your partner then.

           Has life got you down, thing seem to be going bad, or you just don't feel the best.   This is most likely stress.  That stupid little thing that effects us in such a negative way, that it causes problems the other parts of our life.  When we feel stressed we get upset with the ones we love easily, every little problem seems like a major issue, and we actually feel bad.  As hard as it might seem this is the time you need to fall into the arms of your lover.  Let them bring you up, tell them you are stressed and need their help.  Instead of battling this problem by yourself let them give you encouraging words, or help with the problems.  Sometimes just talking about your stress can make it seem less, or just spreading it out and letting your partner hold some of it up will help.  When you feel stressed most people want to shy away from intimacy and yet this is one of the best stress relievers.  So when you feel stressed through some passion at your partner and enjoy something that is pure and natural.  Put yourself into the love making and feel the connection and let the stress be gone.  Sure the problems will still be there but your mind will look at them differently when you have the love and passion of your partner within you.  Don't go it alone use your partners energy to help you, put your pride aside and feel the love.  

Shake the ill feelings.

Being sick is no fun, but this is the time most people will catch a bug or two.  One of the best ways to help each other avoid colds, the flue, and all the other little problems that pop up is to take care of each other.  If one of you gets one of these conditions, the other one needs to be come the doctor.  Make sure to do all you can to make your partner feel comfortable.  Fluff their pillows, make them soup, bring them tissues or rub their back anything you can do will help them get better faster.  These little acts of love are the best medicine for these days when you partner doesn't feel that great.  As the patient however it is your responsibility to pay for these services when you feel better.  So make sure you partner understands how much you appreciate their efforts to make you feel better and comfortable.  

Time, find ways to share it.

          These busy lives we lead consume a lot of time.  Yet our relationship is the one thing we tend not to spend enough of our time on.  We hustle and bustle from work, to activities and find time for our relationships.  We end up at the end of our day tired and putting our relationship off.  This is where we need to take a look at what we are doing during the day to find the time to spend in our relationships.  Do you really need to go to that non profit meeting after work or is spending time with your friends taking up to much of your time.  You need to evaluate these activities and see which ones you can avoid to save time for your relationship.  Why would we want to short change our partner?  Sure we are going to spend the rest of our lives together but do you really want to have to get to know your partner when retirement comes?  Today is the day to start getting to know each other and become the best of friends.  

Leave your underclothes on for a little excitement.

          I think on of the lost arts in an intimate relationship is petting.  Most of the time we shuck the clothes and jump into bed and start our foreplay or intimacy.  There is some excitement however to old fashioned petting.  Petting in rubbing your partners genitals or erogenous areas while they are still clothed.  You can think of it as foreplay but I like to think of it as pre foreplay.  It has a wonderful way of giving a different feel to your normal touch.  Depending on the type of fabric the clothing is made of can change the feel from time to time.  See how excited you can get your partner while they still have on their clothes.  It will be very obvious as they become aroused.  This will also extend your intimacy and build anticipation for the final act.  If nothing else leave your undergarments on and fondle each other as if they were not there.  Touch, lick, or kiss like you would if the undergarments were not there.  Soon you will sense the enjoyment of your partner.  Try it tonight and see how far a little petting will take your intimacy.  

Don't always put on cologne or perfume.

           Smelling nice is a wonderful and alluring thing to do for your partner.  A good cologne or perfume can really transform the evening into something magical for the sense of smell.  However you don't always have to hide behind these wonderful smells.  Each and everyone of us have a unique smell to our bodies and I am not talking about body odor.  I am taking about the wonderful smell that makes you, YOU.  Have you ever smelled your partners hair or enjoyed the scent of there fresh showered body.  Not to mention the scent that comes from being sexually aroused.  Our bodies produce these scents as an attraction so that we are more desirable.  Sure they are not as obvious as a good cologne or perfume but they are yours and your partner and you should enjoy them just as much.  I love to smell my partners hair as we snuggle int bed it is a calming sensation to breath her in.  So next time you start to put on that expensive cologne or perfume remember the one you already have naturally.

Make a date out of Christmas shopping.

          If you celebrate Christmas and you are dreading the crowds of Christmas shopping, there is a simple way to make it better.  Make it a date!  Don't think of it as a chore make it a chance for the two of you to get out and have a fun time together.  Make it a laid back experience and take your time together.  Look at the decorations, the lights, and have a wonderful lunch or dinner together while you pick up the gifts for family and loved ones.  If you shopping for little ones make sure to take time to test out all the toys that are on display and don't forget to pick up a game or two for the both of you to play together.  Christmas is a time to rejoice and have fun so don't let shopping come between the two of you enjoying the time together.

Start his/her engine running.

          We need to remember how important the little "I love you's" are to the growth of our relationship.  As the air turns colder in the cooler climates take this opportunity to show how simple an I love you can be.   You be the one to go out and start the cars on a day with it is blustery cold or the snow is flying.  Grab his/her keys with enough time to make sure his/her car is like your hugs (warm and snuggly) when the get into it.  Place a note on the dash stating your love or put their favorite music on.  Believe me this will come back to you in many a great ways.  Most likely you will be met when you come in with a warm up hug that will melt even the coldest edge off you.   Don't stop there constantly look for these little ways to say I love you and you won't have to worry about your relationship getting iced over.  

Enjoy your time together.

          Nothing shows you more how much you love your partner as when you have to be apart.  Sure we have to have alone time and we have to work.  However when we have to be apart for some reason you can really take to heart how much you truly love your partner.  Think about that next time you have to go to bed by yourself or miss the snuggles of that time. 

Get some special underwear just for making love.

          Nothing breaths excitement into your love life like a sexy pair of underwear.   Get some that you just wear for when it is time to make love to your partner.   Have a special selection to put on and this goes for both men and women.  Yes men  you to can have sex underwear to wear for you partner.  Choose ones with bright colors or maybe something silky that feels good to the touch.  I understand it is a little harder for the guys to find sexy underwear but it is not impossible.  The women have whole stores dedicated to sexy wear but men you have to search harder.  However the effort will be well worth it as you surprise you partner with something other than tighty whities.  

Start you holiday cheer now.

          It is now officially time to start thinking about Christmas and you can start putting the Christmas cheer into your relationship also.  Simple things can spice up your love life.  Mistletoe over your bed, singing Christmas carols together, and even shopping can bring a couple closer together.  However don't stop there make it a point to put more and more into your relationship at this time.  Purchase presents that you can use together, like games you can play, movies you can watch or sex toys you can share with each other.  Christmas isn't just for kids it is also for couples.  So make sure Santa comes for your kids if you have any but also make sure Santa visits your partner this Christmas, too. 

Video games in a relationship?

          Lately I have read that video games are causing more problems in relationships then ever before.  With the newer generation of young adults that were raised playing video games this is an obvious issue.  Countless hours playing games that don't get you anywhere are bound to cause problems.  Here is my rule of thumb on how much time is okay for playing video games.  The number of hours spent playing video game should never exceed the time spent making love in your relationship.  Now that includes foreplay and after play into the mix for time spent making love.  Use this method to keep your partner a little more in tune to your relationship then to his/her game.  If your partner is addicted to gaming then you might find games that the two of your can play together and then set a rule that you only play when you both can play.  Then also make it a point that you have specific times for dates and intimacy without any games on that day.  The point being you have to put gaming in it's place, it might be fun and exciting every once in a while but when it is hurting your relationship you need to take measures.  So put a lock on your xbox, and start focusing on things that make your relationship fun and exciting.  

Do you let your outside life affect your relationship.

           At work they always tell us to leave our home life at home.  Which is a silly statement as it should be the other way around.  We should make sure to leave our work at work.  So many people bring their problems home from work and dump them into their relationship.   Thusly their relationship is affected negatively by work.  Instead of using their relationship as a safe place and a place to feel love they make it a extension of work.  You need to put a force field around your relationship and not let the problems form the outside affect it.  You should fall into your partner arm as a release and not as a place to unload your troubles.  Set up a time to talk about things bothering you and then that is it no more for the rest of the night.  Then focus on being with the person you love and not dragging those troubles into bed.  Same go for family problems or friend problems.  Discuss them and get opinions if you want then forget them.  Then enjoy your relationship they way you are suppose to.  

When sex becomes more of a connection

          Sex is one of the greatest pleasures in life.  Yet there comes a time in a relationship where it becomes more than just getting a need met.  It becomes a spiritual practice that is like a dance between two lovers.  When you start wanting to be a part of each other instead of being two individuals having sex.  For those that understand that intimacy with a person that you have strong ties to both sexually and emotionally is more than just a action.  It is a ritual of love and honor.  As you progress in your relationship you understand each other better you know the likes and wants of your partner.  You also become open to experimentation and conversation about where sexual intimacy can take the two of you.  It become a passion more than a bodily function.  For those of you that reach this wonderful place things will open up to your that you have never seen before.  Your partner will look more beautiful to you, the will be even sexier in your eyes and they will be a light for you to enjoy.  For those of you that reach this place I don't have to tell you how wonderful spiritual intimacy is, you know it and you feel it deep inside.

Bring the light into your home

      There is no doubt that the sun light can make us feel better.  The winter blues are just around the corner and we will start feeling cabin fever here in the midwest.  The answer just might be in the Happy Light a product that produces imitation sun light.  Not like the light bulbs we pick up from our local discount store. With this product you might just be able to shed those blah feelings that get your grouchy and have you feeling trapped.  We can't change the weather outside, unless we move but we can try to make our inside better for the both of us.  If you try one of these lights make sure you both use it and see if it makes a difference.  You might just find yourself snuggling up more than just to stay warm this winter.  

Turn the heat up a little and wear less to bed.

One of my biggest joys is touching my partner. I love to crawl into bed with her and touch her skin. However was the seasons turn colder here my partner wears thicker and warmer items to bed. Silly as it seems this is frustrating to me because I want to feel her and not a think pair of PJ's. My suggestion is to turn the heat up a little and wear less to bed. Sure it might raise the heat bill and be a little selfish but these simple pleasures of touching your partners skin is one that is well worth it. Massage your partner as they wear less to bed to show your appreciation. Snuggle up close and feel the body heat and breath in your partners scent. These are truly wonders you get from being a couple.

You can Yoga together.

Want a wonderful way to get in a better place as an individual and a couple. Look into the practice of yoga. This is a wonderful way to clear you mind and let your body follow. Doing it as a couple also brings in the element of togetherness and produces a special bond. There are all kinds of yoga and you can find the one that best fits the two of you. Treat it as an exercise and a meditation to get the most of our your time together. There are specific types of yoga designed for coupes to do together where touching is involved so that the energy flows between you. These are the types I suggest because I am a firm believer in the fact that touch is as important to our relationships as breathing is to our life. Get into it and go yoga crazy get special clothes for the times when you participate. Get a good yoga mat and learn as much about yoga as you can and then share it with each other. You will be amazed at the difference it can make.

Agreed!!!!

One thing that is an important part of a relationship is agreeing on things. Whether it be where to go for lunch or how much to spend on a new home. You have to find the agreed area between the two of you. Planning a vacation? Pick out all the destinations and then start narrowing down the choices until you get to one you both like then with a resounding shout say AGREED! Make this a practice in your relationship. When you find something you both agree on shout it out, give each other a high five, or kiss. Celebrations are a big part of relationships so go ahead and celebrate when you find something you totally agree on and hopefully it will start happening more often.

Questions, Concerns, Need Help?

I have been at this now for well over a year and a half and I am curious to the nature of the status of my viewers relationships. I am curious if you are reading to improve your already great relationship or if it is a relationship in need of repair? I wonder what problems you have and would like to address? I am opening my doors for you to let me help. I am anxious to hear from many of you and I am sure I can offer suggestions that will help in any situation. Drop me a line at the email below and lets get started helping your relationship.

thecouplesspot@gmail.com

All conversations are kept in confidence.

Snack out of the same bowl.

I think one of the most romantic ways to enjoy a snack is to put it in one bowl and both of your snack from it. This is great for popcorn when your watching a movie or any snack doing anything. The reason it is so great is that it makes you get closer and you might just touch each other as your diving in for another handful. This simple act will make you appreciate your being close to your partner and touch is a need we all share. So next time you get ready for a snack keep this in mind and save washing two bowls and help build a better relationship.

Oral Sex Makes for Happy Sex!

Believe it or not but some couples have never had oral sex? Yes this is true and I am not knocking them but I wonder, WHY? Oral sex is a great way to break up the routine of your sex life plus it is one of the greatest ways to increase your foreplay. You can both take turns performing oral sex on each other or enjoy it at the same time. There are many books on the subject out there with great techniques and ideas to make in mind blowing. Maybe you are a little scared and I understand that but get over that hump and a magical kingdom awaits you and your partner. Oral sex is a great way to extend your sexual intimacy and bring you closer together. There is not reason you cannot partake in oral sex, what ever you problem is there is a solution. The best way to find out what works best for you is for you both to use the trial and error method. Communicate what feels good and what doesn't. Maybe you don't like talking during intimacy and if that is the case set up signals for each other. Tell you partner you will start rubbing their head if it feels good and that you will cough if it doesn't those are simple signs that can't be mistaken. I recently listen to a podcast on the subject and the trend is that oral sex is now considered part of a normal round of intimacy. That means if your not experiencing or enjoying oral sex you are missing the boat. I am throwing you a life jacket grab it slip it on and start pleasuring your lover and let them pleasure you in an oral manner.

Just drop it all and go to dinner

Have you ever had a day when the kids are driving you nuts your stuck in the house and you are ready to just loose it? I am sure most of us have had those days. It's not like we don't love our kids or that the stress of life is really that different then any other day. It's just a break down in strength. When this happens you need to fall back on your relationship to pick you up. This is important to get you a babysitter for the evening and go to dinner with your favorite adult, your partner. Go to a place where the two of you can have adult conversation and make sure it never enters into what is going on at home. Talk about politics, investments, movies, or anything else that grown ups talk about. This is specially needed for the man/woman that stays at home and takes care of the children and the house. That is a stressful job in it's self and sometimes you need a few hours off to recharge your batteries. Plan these escapes regularly and you might just see an improvement in the whole cycle. Honor those that take care of the important things at home they are truly a blessing.

The answers are simple.

Do you want to improve your relationship? If you say yes, then the steps you take are simple. Just put more effort into your relationship. Just like anything else with the more effort you put into building your relationship the better it will be. Get away from excuses like, I'm tired, I'm not putting in the effort unless he/she does, or I just don't feel like it. Excuses are just ways of being lazy and the cure for lazy is effort. Take is slow and each day make it a point to put a little more effort into loving your partner and your relationship. Soon you will start seeing it happen naturally and you will see your relationship blossom.

Judge Lindsey changed the face of relationships.

Judge Benjamin Barr Lindsey

Many years ago for women especially it was thought of that the man owned the wife in a relationship. That the women were not allowed to have their own life and they were demanded to perform certain duties around the house and relationship. This was so wrong. A great Judge back in the 1900's lost his position on the bar because he stated that relationships should be a partnership. That judge was Benjamin Barr Lindsey and the book that got him disbarred was entitled "The Companionate Marriage". Basically what the book said was that relationship were choices and that both sexes were free to have this union and a life. This was considered radical at the time and obviously cost Judge Lindsey dearly. Thank goodness times have changed. While things are not better for all women for a good majority of them life is much better because of actions like Judge Lindsey. For a relationship to truly be enjoyed we must each put as much effort into it as we can and that energy combines into a wonderful feast of love.

The Journey

"Our steps become a journey as we start putting them together. Our steps become easier when there is someone special to help us take them. Now our journey has become one of love." - Zob

Ad some miracle grow to your relationship.

The beauty of nature is obvious to most of us. Looking out over swaying trees and beautiful flowers is one of the great joys of life. You can however use this bit of nature to improve your relationship. We all know that getting a bundle of flowers is a wonderful way to say I love you. Why not take it a step further and start purchasing plants for your home or that can be planted outside later as a display of your love. House plants are great not only as a gift but they give oxygen off that is wonderful for us humans. Plus it can fill your house with an outdoorsy smell that is wonderful. Cut flowers wilt and die and that is not the image you want for your relationship so pick up something the will flourish. Let your give of love grow like you want your relationship to grow. These plants also serve as reminders to your mate how wonderful you think they are. The nice part is you can give plants to both male and female partners without any of the stereo type thinking. Go out today and purchase a love shrub for your mate and then watch it grow like your love for each other.

Get your sex sound track ready.

Your sex life is a wonderful passionate journey that the two of you share together. We don't often think about outside influences that could improve this connection. When we do we think of sex toys, lubes or even costumes. Have you ever thought about the music you can play in the background as being a enhancer to your sex life. Music is a powerful force in our life and I don't know of many people if any that say they can't relate to music. Even deaf people can feel the vibration of music. So why not bring that into our bedroom to help our passion. Think of native american drums, or music with amazing beat to it and how that can get your blood pumping which is a good thing in intimacy. How about Egyptian music to give your sacred place a different feel. Try out many different kinds of music and see how it chances your sex life. Now you can put another playlist on your ipod.

Pay attention to your dreams.

I am hear to tell you to you dreams are interesting things that can give you insight to things that might happen in your life. I am not saying that every dream is a fortune telling item that will bring your and your partner great wealth. However, there is some meaning in some of your dreams. Hopefully your relationship with your partner is your most important one so pay attention to your dreams when they involve both of you. If you dream is about something you are doing for your partner or you partner is in your dream, then you might need to put a little check into your relationship. Maybe your dream is telling you this and if not it never hurts to put a little extra into your relationship. Next time you dream is about the two of you in some manner put some thought into what it might mean you might just be surprised at how much you can learn from your dreams in a round about way.

Why in the hell are you holding back your love.

We are all on guard with our hearts we want to protect them from getting broken. Thusly so many people hold back the love they could be showering their partner with. There feeling is that if they hold their love back they won't get hurt if the relationship goes sour. This is a sure way to start that trend of your relationship turning sour. Your partner will start to sense you are not putting your full effort into the relationship. This will make them start to feel as if you don't care as much as you do. Jealously will start to rise up as well as all other sorts of problems simply because you are not putting your full effort into the relationship. You will then start blaming your partner for doubting you love and yet tis you that give this reason of doubt. Try a little experiment and get fully of your love and see what happens. Touch your partner whenever you get a chance, call them just to say I love you, hold their hand as you are walking places and make mad passionate love to them as often as you can. Look in their eyes as you tell them you love them, let them see you true love. Then see how those problems start to melt away and you get more special feelings in return. Guarding your heart is fine if you don't want to love anyone!

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