Fights are like weeds in your garden!

Farmers can grow the most perfect garden in the world but occasionally a few weeds will pop up. This is the same with fights in your relationship, no matter how strong your relationship is from time to time a fight will break out. Usually these will take the form of an argument and they can be short lived or long and drawn out, that is up to the individuals. If you go into a relationship with the delusion of never having a fight then you are not very realistic. Fights sometimes help clear the air and get things out in the open. There are some important things you need to know when a fight does accrue. First and for most stay away from personal attacks, don't just throw things out in the middle of an argument that don't pertain to the situation. Things like your fat, or stupid or both fat and stupid are not important and will really harm your relationship down the road. Stick with the subject and focus on that. Second, don't let the fight consume you so that you break down the lines of communication, not speaking to each other is the worst type of fight because no resolution will ever be made. If you need time to get away from the situation take a little but make sure to let your partner know how long you will be gone. Lastly and this is a hard one, try to wait for make up sex until the day after you make up. You don't want to associate great sex with a fight and you don't want to fall into that trap of, "we need to fight to have great sex" Set your boundaries and agree at a time when you are not fighting that disagreements will not ruin your relationship, set up a way to discuss the issues in a calm manner so that both partners get a say in the outcome. With a little work your fights can become little more then heated debates.

Artwork above titled Disagreement between Sum of all Parts by Jeff Tanger

When sex isn't an option use your hands!

There are times in your relationship that you might not be able or care to have sex, and that is quite alright. What happens when your partner wants to enjoy a little intimacy and for what ever reason you don't want to. Well that is why god gave your hands, among many other reasons. You can use your hands to pleasure your partner now matter if your man or woman. There are many different techniques, methods, and even toys to help you in the pursuit. Remember just because you are not in the mood or feeling like it doesn't mean your partner should have to suffer or resist their urges. Handjobs are the obvious answer to anyone and you can give them to males and females alike. The book Red Hot Touch in our Amazon side bar is a great read for learning more about this type of enjoyment. Oral sex is another option that most people enjoy receiving and can be quite as nice as any other form of sex. Today they are also many toys that can be used to achieve satisfaction and can be use by or on your partner. Masturbators for men and vibrators and dildos for women are great tool to get your partner off when you just don't feel like it. The important part is being together, if your really don't feel like assisting in any matter then tell them you would love to watch them pleasure themselves and at least the two of you are together instead of in the other room away from each other during orgasm. Don't doom your partner to sexless nights because you are not in the mood both of you are important parts to this relationship and both your feelings are important. So instead of saying, "No way" to your eager partner find another way to excite them, that way both of your needs get met.

Above is a picture of the Tenga Egg the newest technology in masturbation for men.

A great place for a date.

When we think about dating we usually think of hitting the hot spots. The night clubs that are jumping or the new fad places that every one is attending. If you in a relationship or really wanting to get to know this person, why would you want to go to a place that has music playing so loud that you can't even hear yourself, let alone the person your with. Sure if you want to go out dancing this is a great place, but if your focus is getting to know someone or spending some quality time with them then this is not the place. What you need to find is a quiet little bar or restaurant where you can sit and have a great conversation. Maybe they might have some televisions on for people to watch, as long as they are not blaring. There are many of these places around that you can just relax and enjoy your conversation and time with your special someone. If a bar is not what you had in mind you could look for places such as coffee shops, book stores, or even internet cafes. All of which give you a chance to hear and be heard. Look for places the two of you can call your own, don't pick a place that has no business, as it might not be there next week. Pick a place that has a steady flow of people but isn't crammed. Think of places that might have out door seating for the warmer times of the year. Remember that you want you partner to focus on you during this time and vice versa so don't pick places with to much going on it will only end up biting you in the end.

Want to test your Relationship? Then Remodel.

Do you want to get a true test as to what your relationship can take? Then take on any type of remodeling project together. There is something about having to work on the same project within your home that brings out the worst in each other. Weather it's that you can't decide on the right paint color. Maybe you both do the same job in different ways. Believe me their are plenty of challenges to a relationship during do it yourself projects. If you relationship can survive this then you can bet it's a pretty strong relationship.

So many times couples end up not speaking to each other during the remodel. Tempers flare and sometimes we say things before we think about them. So my advice is, If you see that you are going to struggle doing the project together you have two options. The first one is hire someone to complete the job, that way no feelings get hurt and the job gets done very quickly. Yes it will cost you money but think of the time it will save you from being mad at each other. The second option would be don't do it together. One of you work on that project while the other works on a different project in the house. Meet up once in a while for breaks and supper and to keep each other informed on your progress.

With two different people wanting to compete the same chore in two different ways there are bound to be scuffles. The main point is to get the project done and sometimes you just need to back away and let them do it their way. After all if it gets done that is the main goal. So as a test remodel some part of your dwelling with you partner and see how strong the two of you are.

Opening Doors

I thing something that gets a little lost as a relationship goes on is manners. I am going to focus this topic for the men. Gentlemen, when is the last time you opened the car door for you partner? Do you hold the house door open for them? I found myself not doing this about a year ago in our relationship, and I thought to myself "why don't I do that anymore?" I didn't have a good excuse so I began doing it whenever I could. My wife sure did notice. So guys get your buts out of the car a little quicker and open some doors for you sweety. I is a simple thing that goes a long way in a relationship.