Don't forget about your hands.

You might not be able to guess that this post is about oral sex, by the title. I know that people enjoy using toys and vibrators during oral sex, but I feel they are not using the best sex toy, which would be your hands. These hands of your are great for stimulating areas on the body and that should not stop just because you are performing oral sex. Thing about all the thing you can do with your hands while you are pleasuring you partner. Touch is such a turn on, that if should be used to it's full advantage. Reach up and play with her breasts or his nipples, find their erogenous zones and use them as extra sensations during your act. Places like the backs of your knees, grab their ankles, massage their hips are some great suggestions. No pun intended but feel them out and find out places that might help send them over the edge. You can also use your hands for extra stimulation on the genitals. Remember all those nerve endings around the anus, use them to your advantage. Some women like penetration, while you are performing oral sex, and any number of your fingers can help. The scrotum and testicles are very easy to play with while you give him oral sex, and ladies don't be afraid to play with his anus, he just might enjoy it, too.

Use a little trial and error to see what works best for the two of you. One of the biggest complaints people have about oral sex is that it takes too long to get their partner to orgasm. Well you just might speed things up a little by hitting some of their trigger points with your hands. What sets us apart from most animals is our hands, and the wonderful things we can do with them. So next time you are ready for a little oral sex make sure you stretch your hands out who knows where they will end up.

Establish Your House

Have you ever been to those flea markets were they have the person carves your name into a piece of wood. Weather they burn it or carve in to the wood doesn't matter. Make sure you get the year on it as to when you became a family. Include all the names of children on the sign so that everyone feels like it is their sign. So many relationships have children from previous marriages involved with different last names, so put up the first names also. If you don't have any children or treat your pets as children then add them also. You might have to have a pretty big sign but it is worth it to include all the parts of your family.

You can find many different styles of these signs pick one that appeals to your family. I have even seen ones that have characters for each member of the family. Post it where everyone can see it, to show how proud you are of your family. Make a ceremony on the day you put it up, have a cookout or just a family get together. Remember family is a strong bond and putting it in wood makes it stronger.

You know that Annoying friend....

No matter who you are you have an annoying friend. That is common knowledge but how do you put up with your partners annoying friend? Do you just not be around with they come over or you make faces every time they open their mouth. Knowing that this person is a friend of your partner locks you in a little. Number one never tell you partner they have to stop hanging around said friend. The exceptions are it he or she is hitting on you, then you need to tell your partner. If the fact is they are just annoying, then you have to have a little tolerance. Try to get to know them a little better, a lot of annoying people are that way because they don't know how to act in front of you. Understand this is part of your partner, his or her choice of friends is part of their make up. Since you care about your partner, you need to be the bigger person. Chances are that once this person sees that you are not going to take their friend away they will calm down and most likely stop being so annoying.

Think about your friends I am sure if you look closely at their actions you might see the same thing in one of them. Understand that a protection device is all this annoyance is. Make the effort to reassure the friend that you are both going to be part of their life and you should work together. Use their help to throw a surprise birthday party or pick them out something for Christmas. Friends can add a lot of insight into your partner. So look past their annoying features and look for something good in them. Don't ignore them make them feel as if they are part of your relationship.

Many Uses for Vibrators

Most of you that use a vibrator use it to stimulate the clitoris. That is a wonderful and great use for the vibrator. However if that is all you are using it for you need to listen up. Vibrators can be used to stimulate so many areas on the body. Think of all your erogenous zones and how it might feel to have a little vibration on them. Another thing you need to realize is that vibrators are not just for women either. Running a vibrator up and down your man's private parts can be a real turn on. You can also use your machine as a massager you know how they show the women in the magazines using them. Neck muscles, hips, feet can all benefit from the movements a vibrator puts out. So don't be so shy with your gadget and get it out of the drawer a little bit earlier during you time together. I have heard that some people can even get turned on by the sound alone. If you get a powerful enough on you might even be able to mix your drinks with it. Just kidding, don't put anything on your vibrator if you are going to use it inside your partner. The sugar from your drink is not good to be inserted in any one's body that way. However do use your vibrator for fun and excitement, take turns at turning each other on with it. Find a way to place it between the two of you for double the excitement.

Sangria Night

Tonight as an end to your weekend I want you to enjoy a nice glass of sangria with your partner. If you don't know sangria is a very flavorful wine that is popular in Mexico. You don't have to break the bank you can pick up a decent bottle for about five or six dollars. Get you some fruit and let it soak in a pitcher with the wine. This makes for a very wonderful taste for both the fruit and the wine. Find a nice quite place and the two of you enjoy the wonderful taste of your sangria. Experiment with different fruit in your wine and see what you like the best. Sangria does come in different flavors so try all of them out and again see what you favorite tastes are.

Who knows a little sangria might lead to a little dancing, which might lead to a little making out, which might lead to well you know a little more sangria!!! Have a great night and enjoy your partner, they are special.

Fishing for Conversation.

Need an activity that helps improve your conversation between the two of you? Try Fishing, fishing allows plenty of time to get to know each other again. You most often have long periods of quiet time that allows for conversation to fill it. You don't see people just sitting quietly while they are fishing. This makes for a great time to talk about something important also. You are usually secluded in a way from the rest of the world. You can be on the banks of a lake or out in your boat and it is like you are the only two people on earth. Sure you will have to cast or reel in a big fish from time to time. The conversation time is all the time you are waiting for these things to happen.

So if you need to talk or just get reacquainted, grab your fishing pole and some bait and head out to the lake. Most likely you will come back with a better understanding of each other. Plus fishing is rated as one of the most relaxing things you can do, so it has double the benefits.

You were in my dream last night....

I don't know about you but sometimes I dream about my partner. Sometimes they are sexual dreams and sometimes they are just silly dreams. I think, however that it is important to tell your partner about these dreams. That way they know that subconsciously they we are thinking about them. Explain the dream to them and see what they think it meant. You can even purchase books that have some basic explanations for certain types of dreams. I however think it is better to try to come up with the meaning on your own. Now if it is a sexual dream it might be pretty straight forward. Encourage you partner to tell you about when you are in their dreams also. Maybe even start a dream log to see if you can connect the dreams to things that will happen in the future. This is one of those things you can share as a couple and no one else has to know, it's like your little secret. Dream can have many meanings and each interpretation is different so do you best and see what happens as to what your dream meant.

Clicking on the title of this post will take you to a dream dictionary to help find out what your dreams are suppose to mean.

Make your partner one of your buddies.

Can you make your partner one of your buddies? You sure can. The first thing you have to do is not act differently when you are with your buddies, if your partner is there. Don't spend all the time with your partner, and talk to your buddies as if they were one of them. All of you go to a ballgame or out for drinks. You can build a special bond with your special someone if you include them in events like this. You partner will feel as if you trust them to hang out with your friends and that you are not embarrassed by this. Sure there are times when you need to be away from each other and you have to set those boundaries. Say for instance a group of women are going on their annual Christmas shopping spree. Bringing your partner along on a tradition you have would be not a good idea. Vice versa if the man and his friends go on a fishing trip once a year, a partner would most likely chance the trip for the people involved. So set these boundaries and be considerate of your partners feelings in these matters. Going to a ballgame or talking in a show are great opportunities to get all the people you care about involved. Have cookouts and invite them over for drinks. Maybe with a little work you can integrate all your friends and have great get together with them. Just know where to draw the line and don't step on any toes.

Where does sex fall in a relationship!

The great debate will always continue. How much sex is enough and how much is not enough? We can argue this point until the cows come home. Here is my take the amount of sex you have should be a compromise between the two of you. If you want it every night and your partner only wants it once a month then it is your jobs to find a happy medium. Maybe it won't work out perfectly but you have to keep trying to have a solid relationship. First of all sex is good for both of you and should be look at like a vitamin. It actually has some of the properties of a vitamin. It releases chemicals into your body that promotes relaxation and decreases stress. It also makes you closer to your partner. I hear the rumblings now, and yes there is a lot more to a relationship then just having sex. However sex is part of the equation and just like any math you have to have all the variables to make the problem come out right.

Now say one partner doesn't want sex as much as the other. That doesn't mean they can't work something out to make both of them happy. Sending someone away to masturbate is not the answer that only builds up a wall. If masturbation would help your situation it should be done together, even if only one person is getting the satisfaction. If you choice is you don't want to then you shouldn't deprive your partner. Let them do it in front of you, or help them being part of their sexual activity is important. Even if it's not the normal form of sex you still need to make sure your partner is happy in this respect.

Now on the other hand you can't expect your partner to be at your beck and call. You have to give them space. You also have to show a little control, most people are not addicted to sex but there are those that are. Understand that you to have to give in to your partner also. So that means sometimes you don't get to have the sex you want. Deal with it, as we mentioned above sex is not the only variable in the relationship equation. Explore some of the other facets of your life and do something fun together.

My opinion is that every third day you should have sex. This gives you time to build up and get excited over it and also allows the partner that doesn't need it as much to relax and not worry about it. Keep a calendar, the partner that wants sex more will be a little more relaxed themselves if they know tomorrow they get to make love to you. This may sound silly but several of the top names say you should schedule your sex. Dr. Laura Berman is a big advocate of this. For those excited to have sex it gets them focused on that day and they others they can enjoy without the concern or wondering. As for the partner that doesn't want sex as much it also allows them to enjoy the other two days getting what they want. After all isn't a relationship give and take, sharing, and commitment?

I have attached a link in the title of this post that will take you to a blog that is a little on the controversial side to me. However I feel it is good to see several sides of this issue, even the religious one. This Reverend has some really good points and some not so good ones so take it with a grain of salt. Pick out some things from this post and use them and throw out the ones you believe to be bulls***.

Here is my formula for creating the best sex life within a relationship. Both of you write down the number of times a week you would like to have sex. Zero is not an acceptable answer. then add the two numbers together and divide by 2 this is the number of times you should have sex a week. Now be realistic don't say you want to sex 15 times a week. Here is another rule if anyone says over 5 times a week they are disqualified and you go with the other number. A good example would be: Partner A says 4 times a week and Partner B says 1 time a week. So with the formula we get 2.5 times a week. Do not drop the decimal or would up. What we do in this case is we make love 5 times every two weeks. 3 times one week and 2 times the other.

Now this has to be a commitment. Both partners have to agree and their should be penalties in place if either partner breaks the rules. If partner A tries to get sex more then the number agreed upon then they should lose on sexual encounter the next week. Following suit if partner b decides that they are only going to do it one time this week then an extra time will be added the following week. Again keep a calendar a visual representation will help keep both of you focused. If a problem does arise that isn't either of your faults then concessions should be made and you should schedule a make up date. That sounded really like a baseball thing.

In closing take the sexual frequency debate out of the relationship. Know when you are going to have sex and pay the consequences if you don't follow through. Once you get these area out of your problem box think about how much time you will have to enjoy other things in your relationship? Please send me your feelings on this subject and how you deal with this problem I would love to hear how others cope and deal with it.

Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk

It amazes me how couples treat each other. The other night we were with several other couples and I listen to one woman down grade her husband with him sitting right in front of her. Well as the night went on other couples came and went. Until it was finally just a few of us. That is when my mouth almost hit the floor. The woman who was down grading her husband in front of everyone said "I can't believe the way so and so treated her boyfriend." She went on, "I feel sorry for him, they way she talked about him" I couldn't believe my ears, this lady had done the exact same thing. So either she didn't really care about her husband or she didn't even realize what she was saying.

My point here is that you cannot have a solid relationship if you view your partner as baggage. If that is the way you feel about your relationship, then you should be wondering why you feel that way. If you really don't realize that you are doing it then hopefully someday you will step back and see it from the other perspective. Before it is to late. People's feelings are fragile and what you might say in jest can really hurt sometimes. So be careful of what you say to your mate, you might not mean anything by it but they may not see it that way.

Thanks for the picture from Flickr and RussellJSmith