Affection is Responsible

Being There

Sad or bad times are guaranteed to hit your relationship at some time or another. I am not talking about relationship troubles but the ones that come in from the outside of your relationship. How do you handle it when something happens to upset your partner or upset the both of your? How do you comfort you partner to make them feel better? There is no formula you can follow, because everyone is different. While some people need space others need comfort. You cannot judge your partner by what they need. If they need space as hard as it might be you need to give it to them. However if they need the physical comfort you should be there for them in that manner also. You need to find that specific way that you can make your partner feel good. Some people might want to get away and take a trip, while others might want to just hunker down a home. What ever you find that works just make sure you are there as a means of support. This is one of the greatest gifts you can give to your partner and your relationship.

The nice slutty girl.

Ladies until you are in a relationship you have the been forced to decide what type of woman you wanted to be. Unfortunately the male gender has such a narrow mind of classifications for you. Two categories stick out in my mind nice and slutty. There were the types of girls you took home to meet mom and they type that you went out with for only one reason. First of all let me apologies for the male gender, and next let me say that with the open sexual attitudes today this thinking is breaking down fast. Onto my point for to days post, if you are viewing my blog then you are most likely in a relationship or married. Now you can combine all these things into one to create that best relationship you ever had. You can be super sweet, the girl next door while you are out in public and then when you get home you can put on your stiletto heels and make your bedroom a play room. If you have a great partner you no longer have to worry about them telling buddies in the locker room about what the two of you are doing. This gives you the freedom to explore your sexual desires and that make your painters life even better. I don't think you will find anyone that doesn't want a little more excitement in the bedroom . Plus being able to explore your own sexuality can be a real boost for you, too. Being the object of a persons affection is a great way to build confidence and it will bring the two of you closer also.

Just like a garden you need to cultivate your relationship

Do you think that gardens just grow themselves without any assistance from the farmer? Sure you might get an occasional plant to sprout just by letting them grow wild but with a little care and attention that same plant will grow stronger and bigger. Same goes for your relationship. Are you putting time into your relationship, are you putting effort into it, and are you putting your relationship into perspective with all the other things going on in your life? Do you find yourself talking about things that bother you more then the things that make you happy? Well if you one of those people who let outside influences affect your relationship then you need to take a step back and realize that you are not giving your relationship the sun and water it needs to grow. You are putting a dark cloud over your relationship. How important do your rank your relationship? Most of us would say pretty high maybe behind children, would be the only thing in front of our relationship to most of us. However most of us spend way more time focusing on other things then our relationship. We put extra hours into work, exercise, and many other things then giving our relationships the time and respect it deserve. Basically we take them for granted, this is the fast track to losing this relationship. For example how much time do you spend in preparation for making love to your partner? Now compare that to how much time your spend preparing for work each morning. How much time do you spend on your cell phone when you are out together are you chit chatting with friends, family, or co-workers when you should be focusing on your partner and having a good time with them. I think most of us need to really look at how much effort we are putting into our relationships, and I am sure that most of your out there will feel like you can do more if you try just a little. Now get your watering can and roll up your sleeves and start today cultivating the best relationship you can.

Research how scents affect your relationship

Scents are a powerful thing and you never know exactly how someone will act to a certain scent. I want to suggest you do a little research on the subject in your relationship. Get some different scented candles and have them burning with your partner comes home. Log down their mood and how they act throughout the night, then change the scent the next time. Get 7 different candles and try a different scent each day then repeat the cycle the next week. Do this for one month then look over your log book to see if you see any similarities. Maybe the smell of lavender puts your partner in a mellow mood where they just want to relax, or maybe the smell of cinnamon makes your partner a little frisky. To test your scent findings switch things up. If you partner comes home in a bad mood choose the scent that made them the most relaxed and see how they react to the scent. Do they calm down or does it have no effect. You might just find that the scents will help you set a mood for your time together. If you find a scent that makes your partner in just the mood you enjoy then you better take stock in that company and buy all the candles in that scent you can find.

Affection in front of the kids (ewww yuck!)

Something that I think needs to be done in your relationship is to let your children know you are in love. Show each other affection in front of them. Now I am not talking about getting down and dirty. Save that for the bedroom or any other room as long as the little ones are asleep. However, let your young children know it is okay for the two of you to touch each other and be affectionate with each other. I don't ever remember seeing my parents touch, kiss or hold hands when I was growing up. I think that without such a vision in a young child’s mind he/she might think that it is not to be done. Or he/she may grow up to believe you shouldn't show that you care about someone in front of other people. It may sound crazy, but I can see this leading to a lot of problems in a relationship. Keeping the fact that you are attracted to each other away from your children gives them a different idea of what a relationship is! I think of all the domestic abuse in this country, and how many children see that. Far too often that child grows up to think it is okay or the norm.

Well, what if we reverse that? What if a child sees his/her daddy kiss his/her mommy or hold hands with her? Don't you think that will help a child grow up knowing that a relationship should be nurturing. Young children love to imitate their parents. Let’s start showing them how to care about one another. Heck maybe even someone else’s kids will see you holding hands or quickly kissing each other goodbye and see that is okay. From time to time your child might walk in on you during a little more intimate situation (come on you know what I mean- sex), and I think one thing that is important and maybe a little hard to do is not jump up right away like the two of you are doing something wrong. If you can slowly move apart and address the young child’s needs then explain to them that mommies and daddies need time alone together, you just might help them deal with similar situations when they are adults.

Be up front with your children in regards to love and relationships. Not only will they understand it better, but you will definitely help them out later in life. So many relationship problems and sexual problems can be traced back to parents. Don't be the one that makes your son feel like kissing his wife is wrong or the one that makes your daughter feel like sex is dirty. Use the right words and explain when they are curious and their future partners will thank you!