Smoothies, fun and enjoyable.

Kitchen chores such as cooking and cleaning are usually not much fun. However making smoothies with you partner can not only be fun but it can be health for you also. Plus the clean up is a breeze. First of all make sure you have a great blender for this adventure. If not you can pick one up on your next step, which is to get your butts to the store. Search the aisles for fruits and juices you enjoy. Things like bananas, pineapple, blueberries, orange juice, kiwi, the list goes on and on but these will be your ingredients for your smoothie. I personally like to make mine with milk or cream, but that is what I like. Now once you get home here is where the fun starts. Cut up your items that need to be downsides for the blender making sure to feed each other a piece from time to time. Now to make this smoothie a couples smoothie you have to take turns adding ingredients. Pick your base, it can be a juice base or my preference milk based. Next start adding the other ingredients one by one with both of you taking turns picking your favorite. Once all items are in the blender, blend away and then pour into some special glasses and enjoy your personal couples smoothie. Oh, I forgot about the easy clean up, open up the door of the dish washer and up in the blender and utensils used to downsize the ingredients and presto you are done.

Are you the aggressor in your sex life, if not become one tonight.

Usually one person in a relationship is the more aggressive one when it comes to initiating sex. If that is not you, then tonight I want you to suck it up and be the aggressor. What a shock to your mate if you are the one that hunts them down to make love. This might be a little hard for you but your mate will truly love it. If you can't go full out then at least make some sort of effort. Nothing shows you partner that you love them more then breaking out of your normal routine to show them you care. Wear something sexy, send naughty text messages to them, passionately kiss them when they least expect it, turn off the television and give them a look that cannot be mistaken, what ever you do make it bold and direct statement. Tonight you be the jungle cat stalking it's prey, just don't break the skin when you bite.

Couples Dice - Every couples should have some.

I am sure you have seen them sometime in your life. Maybe you already have some in your possession. They are couples dice and they are a great item for every couple to have. They are simple and basic but they can get your motor running in a hurray. Basically they are set of dice that instead of number or dots on them have actions and body parts listed on their six sides. The first one has actions like lick, suck, kiss, rub, etc and the second one has body parts like hand, breast, neck, genitals, etc on it's sides. You roll both dice and do the action on the body part that is rolled. Pretty basic, everyone can figure this game out. You can however make your own more advanced form of this game by simply corresponding the numbers on a regular set of dice to sexual acts or chores to make it more exciting. Playing a game to get your blood pumping isn't that bad of idea after all it adds a little chance into your relationship and gives you that thrill of gambling as you watch the dice decide your fate for the night. Again you can pick these dice up at almost any specialty store, I have even seen the in gas stations but they truly are a great way to put a little extra into your love life with out breaking the bank.

"Sex is the glue that holds a relationship together"

"Sex is the glue that holds a relationship together" is a quote I heard on the podcast The Marital Intimacy Show that you can pick up on itunes. I agree whole heartily with this statement. There are so may aspects to our relationships but certain areas seem to help stabilize our relationship. Things like trust, care, concern are all very important in a relationship. However if you are in a committed relationship sex is the aspect that you don't share with anyone but your partner, these other factors you can experience with others that you have contact with such as friends and family. Heck you can even have trust, care and concern for your boss for peat sake. Sex however is the one thing that you save only for your relationship (I don't mean to offend those with alternative lifestyles, but my understanding is you have a relationship with each and every person involved in your life style) When you thing about it then the more glue you put on something the stronger the hold so it stands to reason that the better your sex life the better your relationship. As a matter of fact of all the people that I consider as having a great relationship the one thing that they have in common is a great sex life. It goes hand in hand. So, put some glue into your relationship today.

Pick the right lube for you!

Relationships have their share of friction, but you don't have to have as much in your sex life. Lube is an essential part of any relationship. If you look all across the world you will see that most couples either have lube on their headboard or somewhere near their bed. Lubrication is a wonderful tool to help explore and improve your sex life. While the woman's body naturally produces lube for sex sometimes it's not enough or doesn't produce fast enough. Plus sometimes things boldly go where no natural lube is available (Sorry for the Star Trek reference). Now what type of lube is the best, well I can't help you there! In my experience I believe that it is a personal choice and what works well for someone can have the opposite effect on others. The biggest thing is to make sure the lube you are using is safe, do your research and find the lube that is best for your body, you might have to try several before you find one you like, but that might be fun in itself. Some lubes are not compatible with condoms or sex toys so to avoid ruining the moment make sure to check the packages and do your research. Friction in your relationship will happen but you at least can avoid it in the bedroom.

Listen.

One of the hardest skill to master in a relationship is the art of listening. We all want to add our two cents worth and can't wait to bust into the conversation to do so. Sometimes however we just need to listen and not offer any advice or insight to the situation. Sometimes people just need to vent out frustrations and the person they want to do this with is you. It is hard as the person that just listens to not want to help out, but this only makes matters worse. The person venting just needs to get their feelings out in the open and when they do the release comes. Usually if they have a point that is not a valid one they will see the errors of their way as they vent. They might come across as yelling at you but they are not, they just want to pretend they are letting the person or situation that upset them have it. The yelling or raising of their voice is just a natural defense and another means of letting the stress out. The best thing you can do is hold all comments to the end, after they have told or screamed the whole situation and then run down scenarios with them as you try to find solutions or comfort.

Depriving yourself a little make everything a little better when you get it.

Depriving yourself of the wonders of life sometimes make them that much better when you finally do get to indulge in them. Take for instance deserts, they are not that great for you but if you partake of them all the time you get fat. However if you go without them for a period of time they taste so much better, when you finally get them. Sex can be the same for you. Think about it if you had sex every single day it might not be as special. Don't get me wrong I am not telling anyone to go even more then a week without sex. Sometimes, however a couple of days of rest helps you build up and be ready to go longer and stronger then ever. The next time you make love wait about 3 days before enjoying it again and see how anxious you get while you are waiting. Now to make this work right make sure not to masturbate either so you get a total build up that is ready to release. I know from my personal experience that if I put a little buffer in their the night I finally do get to have sex again I can usually perform way better and more often. Plus if you let that sexual tension build up a little the release seems to be way more amazing. Again let me reiterate that I don't believe that you should wait to long because sex is great for your health and mental state.

Throw in the hat when you want to avoid the "What do you want to do" blues

Okay it is time for the two of you to get out and have some alone time. You set down to decide where your date night will take you then you hear those dreaded words and make your cringe, "What do you want to do?" and the most typical response is "I don't know what do you want to do?" This can go on for hours, and when someone finally makes a suggestion the other person usually shoots it down. Well here is a fun and exciting way to take the "What do you want to do" out of your dating plans. Write down all the places you like to eat, activities you like to do, and even the odd things you do every once in a while. Then cut out each idea and throw them into a hat. Keep the hat in a safe place and now every time you get a chance to get out draw a piece for paper from the hat, presto that is what you are going to do. You can put anything into the hat and if you want to make a couple of hats up. One with places to eat and another for activities to do after you eat. Every time you think of a new place to go or something new to do throw it in the hat. The more ideas in the hat the less bored you will get. You can throw the idea back into the hat if you wish but I suggest keeping it out for the new time you draw. Now instead of saying "what do you want to do?" you will save all that time and be able to spend more of it enjoying each other.

Lips Like Sugar

Lips like sugar can mean so many things. It can mean that your lover kisses are as sweet as candy or it can mean that when you perform oral sex on a woman that her lips are juicy and sweet. I first heard the term in a song by Echo and the Bunnymen when I was in high school many years ago. Violet Blue used the term as a title of one of her books about women's erotica (Which you can find by clicking the title of this post) Whatever the meaning is to you make sure to use this this little statement to describe your partners lips sometimes. Right after a passionate kiss is a great time to say "Your lips are like Sugar" Get into a habit of comparing your partner to wonderful thing and use similes and metaphors to express your ideas. Much like poems your words can make someone feel great, so don't delay start today.

Now enjoy a little bit of my youth with the video from Echo and the Bunnymen.

Communication Exercises

Communication is and always will be a hurdle in a relationship. We often have trouble communicating our wishes to our partner. Sometimes we fear hurting his/her feelings or we are afraid of being rejected by him/her and having our own feelings hurt.

Here is a little communication exercise that they two of you can implement into your relationship.
It will help clear up some communication problems. In my opinion, one of the biggest problems in a relationship is that one person is more out spoken than the other. This leads to discussions being one sided and the other person not being able to get his/her point across.

What you need to do is set up a couple of days for single communication for each one of you. Pick a day and a time when the two of you have time to sit down together and discuss things.  Set aside 15-30 minutes.

On the first day only one person gets to talk.  He/she expresses things that are bothering him/her as well as things that make him/her happy. Here is the kicker, the other person cannot respond to anything until the next day. It is important for him/her to remain quite and listen without interruption even if he/she disagrees with what the speaking partner is saying.

Both partners let that soak in until they can sit down again.   Then it is the other partner's turn to speak openly.  Not only does this offer the quieter of the two to get his/her point across, but it helps both partners learn to listen.  

Make this a regular practice - perhaps once a week or once a month.  Do this and you will see a change in your relationship as the communication lines begin to open.